Talking to Myself

Its been a long time!!!

2008-12-22T13:33:00.002-05:00

Hello in blogger world! Its been a very long time since I checked in, read, posted, stayed in touch. Life has been very busy and moving forward.

I hope this posting finds everyone well, hopefull and ready for another year of living.

Take care and Merry Christmas!

Jen

Fall

2007-10-23T12:01:00.000-04:00

Goodness how time flies by!! I am alive and doing okay. I have been so busy with the kids activities this school year and work that I have barely made time for anything else.

I am so very proud of both children. Daughter is in the Chose to Lead program and has her first after school meeting today. Two fifth graders from each class get chosen and help with all the school functions and fund raisers with the teachers and other staff. She is also in the Student Partners Program which buddies up a fifth grader with a special needs student. Daughter had to fill out an application, have her parents write a recomendation, her teacher write a recomendation and she had to write up a semi-resume as well. I am so glad she was chosen for this. Daughter has also been playing Volleyball and started band playing the alto sax! See so busy my head spins as I type this.

Dear son...he is doing great in kindergarten and is really loving schoool. He has been playing flag football and can't wait to start swimming lessons and baseball camp this winter. He loves being around his sister but is making lots of his own friends. Its amazing to witness the changes in him.

As for me....the kids are keeping me busy so that is enough for the moment. I am still a confused lady but trying to be happier in general and not look at the past if I can help it. I can't change the past only look at today and tomorrow. I am going to try and make some rounds here today...catch up with my internet friends...you are the ones that always seem to give me the brighter lift!

Kindergarten!!

2007-08-22T12:12:00.000-04:00

Well my baby's first day of kindergarten was today! It is a dreary rainy day here in Columbus, Ohio. But that did not dampen my son's mood. Mitchell was so excited this morning he did not care that mommy forgot to buy him a boy umbrella so he just used the blue and white polka dotted one!

I can't wait for the end of the day to hear about both J and M's first day back to school. J is a 5th grader this year. It is amazing to me how beautiful she looked this morning. They are growing up so fast but I am so happy that I am making time every day to cherish them in their childhood moments, storing those memories for a far off rainy day of my own.

A game!! Come on....play along!!

2007-08-20T12:59:00.000-04:00

Things I have learned from movies... THE GAME PART IS TO PLACE WHICH MOVIE APPLIES BEST TO EACH NUMBER....ready set go!

1. Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people whether they are employed or not.

2. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.

3. Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.

4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override communications system of any invading alien society.

5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

6. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

7. If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.

8. Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.9. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers, and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

10. During all police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.

11. All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.12. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.

13. It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.

14. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off even while scuba diving.

15. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

16. When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.

17. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

18. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will whine when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

19. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.

20. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.

21. Word processors never display a cursor on screen, but will always say: "Enter Password Now".

22. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments. Tires will squeal on any surface, at any speed.

23. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

24. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

25. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.

26. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

Have fun!!

Hello, is anybody out there?!

2007-08-02T12:13:00.000-04:00

I am here, I am reading, lurking, relaxing, whatever you would like to call it. I am not commenting too much but know that I am reading many of your blogs.

The summer is dragging by but I am starting to feel a peace with myself as time rolls on. Maybe when things start to slow down a little in the fall I can get back to being my silly self and writing about being a Rock Star, the great things my kids that day or even my jump into an altogether new career.

The past year and half is going to be put into a box in my heart and mind, to be brought out on occassion. Its so cliche to say this, but I am re-discovering myself and what I want in this life. Work harder, be remembered well. There is a time, a place, a reason for everything and everyone you encounter. Take it all in and be happy, suck it up, write about it, live it. As long as at the end of the day you can sleep.

Have a good end of the summer everyone and I hope to be back soon spreading some silliness!

Struggling to swim

2007-07-24T11:15:00.000-04:00

Amazing insight from an incredible Myspace Blogger.

Go read some of his stuff.....

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=64817099&blogID=291181867&indicate=1

July 4th and Having some fun!

2007-07-05T11:31:00.000-04:00

Life does move forward and I have learned twice over how to appreciate the loved ones we have. My family enjoying the boat, wave runners and then the fireworks. It was great to put life away for awhile. I hope everyone had a safe and fun holiday!

Mother Mary

2007-06-27T16:02:00.000-04:00

When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom Let it be
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right it front of me
Speaking words of wisdom Let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be

Whisper words of wisdom
Let it be

And when the broken hearted people
Living in the world agree
There will be an answer
Let it be

For though they may be parted there is
still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer Let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be yeah,
there will be an answer Let it be
Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom Let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom Let it be

And when the night is cloudy
There is still a light that shines on me
Shine until tomorrow
Let it be

I wake up to the sound of music
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom
Let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
There will be an answer Let it be

Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
There will be an answer
Let it be

Let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom
Let it be, let it be

I have been tagged!! EIGHT RANDOM THINGS ABOUT ME....

2007-05-22T11:51:00.000-04:00

1. I hate tomatos, yet I can eat brushetta, a little tomato sauce, pizza etc. Its weird, just plain tomatos taste horrible to me!

2. I am an only child. I have debated throughout my life whether or not its been a good thing. I believe I may have missed out on having a sibling but also believe that being an only child helped shape who I am and the kind of person I became.

3. I have lost 20 lbs. since September 2006 and have managed to maintain my current weight during that time. I want to lose an additional 10 lbs. so I will be at my freshman year of college weight. I am satisfied with where I am but want to feel healthier.

4. I had 5 surgeries on my right leg due to an achillis tendon tear. One of the worst periods of my life. It lead to a lot of introspection and questioning of how we are living our lives.

5. I have been known to read smutty books or stories!! shhhhhh

6. I cry at almost any sad story, commercial, book, etc.

7. I love Christmas and shopping for presents. I wish I had the money to buy everyone I know a present I know they would enjoy!

8. I can still rollar skate!!

I suppose this is the part where I am supposed to tag some people......how about weltek cheesehead, slharris, and kimmah....don't worry kids if it takes forever!!

Arrested!!

2007-05-02T13:00:00.000-04:00

Mario needs to slow down, koko has a lead foot, the police love me!! giggles....and on with the story.....

Last Friday morning I was late for work, day dreaming about Tim Horton's and I think sex, and was not paying much attention to my speed. Until I spotted the Columbus Freeway Patrol car, look down at the speedometer and see that I am cruising along at 80 mph! Oh shit was my out loud thought and decided to pull over. The Police did not even have to put on their lights, I just knew I was caught, no way to fight this one.

See Dear Officer Venrick (DOV from here on out) walks up does his little speech about did I know why he pulled me over etc. I told him yes and that I was off in la la land and that my vehicle never feels like I am really going that fast. I figured the truth could not be any worse than a lie I could come up with. DOV smiles and says well its your lucky day then because I am on a training excercise and have 3 recruits with me. ! I am thinking YES.....as the recruit is walking up to the vehicle. So we go through the speech again, I hand the recruit my license, insurance and registration information. They say they will be right back, even though we all know this takes at least 10 minutes.

My 10 minutes pass on by and DOV comes back to my vehicle and says "I HAVE SOME BAD NEWS!" I am a little bit surprised which turns to shock when his next statement is "THERE IS A WARRANT OUT FOR YOUR ARREST!" I literally did the Home Alone face and was stuttering wha wha what?! DOV then states "oh there is more....your license is expired!" Now I am thinking "oh my god" and ask DOV "am I going to be arrested?" At this point I am thinking wait wait, I told DOV that I did have 2 tickets in the fall in Pike County but I paid those promptly back in November. DOV was actually being very kind, I mean come on....middle aged mom in a SUV with juice bags, stuffed animals and toy cars all over the place, not too mention how cute I looked that day, how could DOV resist!! Anyway, DOV states that they are going to check and make sure that the warrant is still valid and that more than likely no arrest will be made.

At this point I am in panic mode. I call my office and speak to the young attorney, Brian, to let him know the situation. He makes a call to a buddy that takes care of traffic court violations and says he can meet me at the courthouse if needed. After I speak with Brian I call my husband who proceeds to ask me what I am wearing, I tell him and hubby replies "you are gonna look good as a jail bird with all those ladies up in the courthouse!" So that really gets me giggling. I was going to have one of two emotions. Either cry and panic or laugh at myself and the situation. I chose laughter!

P.S. More to come.....you know my stories can never end with one telling!

My 40th Birthday!

2007-04-15T20:12:00.000-04:00

Last month on March 24 I started a new decade of my life. I really had a great time and my husband went all out to make sure my little party was a surprise. I have many pictures from that night and am trying to decide which ones to post. LOL.....it was truly a great time and the most fun I have had in quite some time. I am sharing another pic of the kids and I. The helped plan the party and had such a great time helping with that.

A taste of Spring!

2007-04-11T10:45:00.000-04:00

Finally had a bit of nicer weather yesterday with the temps hitting 50 degrees and the sun peeking out us now and again. The weather in Ohio is such a pleasure, going from 70 on Tuesday to freezing rain and snow on Thursday. I was NOT dreaming of a white Easter thank you!

So our taste of spring yesterday was enjoyable not only because of the little warmth we received but because it is the start of our son's baseball career! Yesterday was Mitchell's first T-Ball practice and he was soooooo excited! His excitment and smiles were infectious and I could not help but have fun with him. His team is the Yankees (my dad's favorite) and they received their hats and shirts. Here is a pic for your viewing pleasure! (scary I am, now that I can get pics to upload LOL)!!

Hope everyone is having a great week!

Another picture!!

2007-03-30T19:31:00.000-04:00

Uh oh....she is getting good at the pictures!! LOL this is my Uncle Joe, the kids and I at Endless Caverns located outside of New Market, VA.

Look a picture!!

2007-03-30T19:17:00.000-04:00

My mom, my son and daughter and I at Christmas time!

I am so cliche...in more ways than one!!

2007-02-26T22:57:00.000-05:00

I will only discuss two ways in which I was cliche today!! I have been utterly and completely depressed and a bit angry. My son was sick today and I was listening to my "sad songs" while I went to pick up his prescription. I had a feeling of total helplessness and decided to drive around some more while listening to my line up of "getting out the good cry" music.

At some point I thought about stopping for a shot of tequila and a beer. Then it occurred to me it would not do me much good to get drunk at 5:00 p.m. on a Monday. I replaced getting drunk with the euphoria of.....thats right....buying new shoes!! I bought 3 new pairs for myself and 1 pair for my daughter! I also purchased a new purse and I tell you what....I got back in the car and put in my Jet CD and listened to "Cold Hard Bitch"! Once I got home I was ready to face everyone in this household to only discover......

MY BARE MINERALS MAKEUP had arrived!! After many years of hearing about these products at OT I was sucked in on some infomerical. My daughter and I put in the helpful handy dandy DVD and followed all the steps. I am highly impressed with this product and can't wait to use it again in the morning!!

Some days I am glad to be a woman and a bit cliche!!

A new blog look!!

2007-02-23T22:11:00.000-05:00

I finally switched over to the "new blogger" through gmail. Not really sure how much has changed, does not seem like much. I like what I changed things to but I am not the greatest at adding touches. I did add a picture I like and will attempt again to get a picture of myself up here. Drives me nuts that I can't figure out these simple things. LOL

New look, maybe a new outlook and trying this blog thing more regular again. Hope this post finds everyone well.

Life...and progress

2007-01-30T11:22:00.000-05:00

At this point in time I am still at home with my husband. He has taken a strong interest in attempting to save and work on the marriage. He has gone so far as to sign up for a marriage counseling class online. Hubby has forwarded each workshop/email to me. There are some very interesting and valid points that have been made in reading those emails and I can see us in quite of few of those situations.

But it is back to the question of how am I handling it all. I am day by day. There are days that I think what we have in life is worth it and I should make the necessary attempts. The following is a quote from one of these "seminars"...

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous
experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You
can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it
day in and day out. That's why we have the
expression "the labor of love." Because it takes
time, effort, and energy. And most importantly,
it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to
make your marriage work.

Hubby is trying, making a real effort and here I sit feeling sort of angry and resentful. I think I need some counseling to help me get a better grip on what I am feeling. But do I owe it to him, the children and the sake of the marriage to stop feeling mad, depressed and hopeless? I need to step out of my little box and look at myself and realize my life is not so bad. Where do I want to be in 2 years, 5 years, 10 years.

It is good to know that I am not the only person out there that feels these emotions. I truly appreciate the comments and advice. It helps more than any of you know!

Happy New Year!!

2007-01-04T10:41:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year to all my friends that check in on me from time to time.

I have been busy with this new job now since I have been here. I am back to that daily stressful grind and it leaves a horrible distaste in my mouth. I think its a new year with some new starts but I have the same old issues plaguing me. The career has not been that easy to change, at all. I came back to what I know best but not sure I care enough about any longer to be the best. I have become lazy and complacent and I really detest that. So I will be striving to just suck it up and be the best at what I do and hope that someone notices and it pays off somewhere, someplace, somehow.

My marriage has been in limbo now for over a year. I had tried and tried and when I was ready to throw in the towel, he started making these amazing gestures. Gestures that were never made in the past 16 years. Attempts to keep me and be sincere about it now that he realizes he is on the verge of losing me. I am in the toughest spot I have ever been in. I am not sure if I have it in me to give in and stay or move on and start anew. Everyone I have talked to says that if he is willing to try and the changes he is making are sticking for more than a week then I should give the marriage a chance.

I also have come to realize that there is this possibility of there being more than one person out there for each of us. I have attempted to not have outside influences affect my judgment in my marriage. But sometimes it is so hard to not look at that greener grass. Wonder what could be, how would things be different with another person.

I can honestly say that the best thing in my life right now is my children. I am putting them first for the most part and trying not to be selfish this year of my midlife worries. I love my children and want them to be happy, so staying and trying in the marriage is what I have been doing the last month. But my heart has not truly been in it.

So this blog has come full circle. I believe I named this blog talking to myself partly because that is how my husband used to make me feel. I needed an outlet, a place to vent. Blogging helped me for awhile and I found a wonderful outlet. But here I am back to the same point and beyond when I first started here. I have some decisions to make and hope that I make the correct ones.

Boy when I post an update, do I post an update!

Michigan week!!

2006-11-15T11:58:00.000-05:00

GO BUCKS!!!! I am a one of the lucky souls that has tickets for this historical event....well sporting event that is. This is the most anctipated game EVER that I can remember in my life time. I come from a long line of OSU graduates (even though I did not) and not in 103 years has there been a game like this!! The hype, the commentary, the booze!! That is right folks the party starts Friday afternoon at our office and does not stop until I wake up Sunday knowing that OSU has kicked #2's ass and will do so again in the Championship game! (counting chickens and all that....)

WOO HOO!!

Hiatus or something........

2006-11-08T13:13:00.000-05:00

I like how momma put that about a few of us bloggers. I am the something part....not quite sure what to write about or say. Been going through some life changes and the new job, while I like it, it is keeping me busy.

I am so restless and uncomfortable right now. I wish I could make some earnest changes in my personal world but my children are holding me in place. I have not been the best mom lately nor a good daughter. Those things are starting to weigh on my mind. I have let friendships pass and other things fall to the wayside that I enjoy, like this blogging thing.

I know I am not perfect but I need to strive to do better in my everyday living. Love more, complain less and be happy.

Hope this rambling finds everyone well and healthy!

Hi I am Jen and I am addicted to.....

2006-09-14T09:38:00.000-04:00

Crap TV...yes thats right, my summer viewing has consisted of Reality TV. Rock Star-SuperNova, Big Brother AllStars, Project Runway, and some really bad crap that NBC programed with Regis as the host, and even more bad brain deterating garbage that stars Flavor Flav! Sometimes a girl just can't help but look at the train wrecks that frequent "reality tv".

My favoriate crap, by far, has been Rock Star. However, I was sorely disappointed last night that SuperNova chose Lucas Rossi as their lead singer. I like him but, like Dave said, I am not so sure I can sit through a 2 hour concert listening to him. I will have to see how he actually sounds on a CD, song after song. Also, Gilbey needs to step up and sing better back up and play better lead guitar if this band wants to have any kind of chance. I think Clarke will be the ego one of this group.

Big Brother, ah what to say what to say! Chilltown is the funniest most entertaining contestants to ever play a reality game in the history of reality tv! Brrrrnnggg Brrrrnnnggg....f'in hiliarous and I loved watching Dr. Will play everyone like a well toned violin! Kudos to Will and Mike Boogie for making me smile when I needed brain candy.

Now that most of these shows are over we are moving on to Dancing with the Stars. My children love this show and its something we can watch together and enjoy. I am rooting for Emmett Smith. I enjoyed his attitude and was pleasantly surprised by his moves, much better than Jerry Rice from last year.

Now my all time favoriate reality junk starts soon....Survivor....woo hoo. Not sure how much of it I will actually watch this year. Times have become busy in our household and my brain cannot handle much more dumbing down after this summer of lack luster programing.

With that I leave you with a a quote from Jeff Probst "Fire is life" well at least for some. In my house life has become "Reality TV"!

Lets talk about sex!

2006-08-22T15:10:00.000-04:00

Lets talk about sex baby, lets talk about you and me and all the good things....

So chat away....opinions, thoughts, getting enough these days? Does your personal life swirl around the thought of sexual encounters or has marriage and young children done away with the intimate moments!

LOL I know odd topic for me but just want to see what can be stirred up in my little blog here!

Love

2006-07-14T10:25:00.000-04:00

There are so many different kinds of love. The love of your spouse or signficant other are usually the biggest loves of our lives. The only exception I can make to that is our children. There is your love for your friends and family. Sometimes the love you have for certain members of your family is only a deep caring.

Deep loves are so rare. I love my children deeply and I know at one time I loved my husband deeply. How do we get back to that kind of love without being hurt or overtaken by other emotions? Or the day in and day out workings of life?

There has been so much more that has been going on in my life in the last year that I am struggling with so many emotions. How do you reconcile hypocritical behavior and not lose yourself? How do you forgive yourself and the persons that you love, because we are afterall just human. Most of us don't intentionally set out to hurt eachother.

I have truly tried to understand what goes through a man mind when dealing with a relationship. I have tried to be open and honest but when all that fails where does it leave you? I still feel the love, I can't stop loving. Does that make me a fool?

Congratulations to my friend Scott

2006-06-28T10:15:00.000-04:00

Scott is listed in my links under Scott but his blog is called Hard to Want. Scott is getting a short story published and I just wanted to show my appreciation of his writing and hard work!

Cheers to you Scott and way to go!!

The weekend, new job and life

2006-06-26T10:12:00.000-04:00

So far the new job is going ok. I started last Tuesday and the woman I replaced is off on maternity leave. It is doubtful that she will return to this firm but I am hoping she thinks about part time and helping out around the holidays. I will be running the title company by myself and am my own boss. It sounds lovely but in reality it may be difficult planning vacations and days off with the kids.

The weekend so tons of fun. We went to Cleveland Saturday for the Reds game. There was a group of 15 aging 25 to me. I refuse to admit I was the oldest of the group (oops I just did!) My sister in law and her husband arranged the fun filled weekend and we once again partied like the rock stars we are! It was fun to get away and was lucky my parents split the weekend up with the kids. I have not gone out in Cleveland in ages and was surprised at the night life and bars. I danced my rear off and had a blast at a place called the Blind Pig. One of my favorites local bands from my youth, Reagonamics, was playing 80s music and the whole bar was hopping. Oh I also wore my very hot cowboy hat which was recently purchased in Vegas. I was in Vegas 2 weeks ago and need to blog about that fun time too!

My son had his 5th birthday last Thursday and he officially is a young man. They grow up so quickly I can't believe it. I cried that day. I did not tell anyone I cried but I did, I no longer have a baby. Life is one never ending change and sometimes you just get hit over the head.

Woo Hoo

2006-06-14T10:05:00.000-04:00

Lots to write here!! I have a new job, start June 20. It is back to the small law firm for me but it is doing what I know best. I will be a one person title company for them, am replacing a lady who has been there for 7 years and is only leaving to be a stay home mom. I got a really good feeling from all the partners I met plus I gained another increase in salary. I am excited and want to make this position work, not necessarily the dream job, but I think a good direction to go in. Lots of flexibilty so I will be able to take care of the family.

And the search is on

2006-05-25T10:55:00.000-04:00

In the two (2) days since I was told my job was eliminated I have sent out 8 resumes and have had 4 call backs. I have set up three (3) interviews for next week and turned down one, the money for that is not what I am looking for.

My current boss provided me with a stellar reference letter and his wife who is an attorney had one of her partners pass my resume to a big corporation. I have actually worked with that corporation, they were a client of a firm I worked for back in the 90s. They recogonize my name and the old firm and the VP wants to interview me! I am very excited about this prospect. I believe once again I am in the right place at the right time.

Thanks for coming back and listening to my saga. I do have some fun stories and family stuff I want to throw out there and will once time allows next week.

smooches peeps!!

This day sucks!

2006-05-23T13:20:00.000-04:00

I am just full of good news these days....never anything good to post it seems.

Due to economic reasons corporate has pulled the plug on expansion in our area, hence my job has been eliminated. Yes the job that I have probably waited years to have. My last day is June 2 if I so choose, which I have. I don't like to burn bridges and there is a chance that the market could turn around over the next year or so and they will hire be back. I am at the top of my boss' list and he is pretty torn up about having to lay me off. It seems he jumped the gun hiring me because he did not want to lose me to another company. So I will have a good reference from here and a decent explanation as to my employment time frame.

I really hate to be in this position again and feeling pretty lousy about everything. So it seems that I will be returning to the legal field, sucking things up for the family benefit. I will have to attempt a serious attitude adjustment regarding my feelings on working for attorneys again. (No offense to those blogging/online buddies that are in the legal field)

Maybe I will cash in the 401K and go back to school, become a teacher, stay home with kiddos, do something different!! Money really does make the world go around!

American Idol.....small rant!!

2006-05-11T12:09:00.000-04:00

Chris was my fav....cannot believe America chose the others over him. I loved Katherine too, however, her last two weeks have been weak. She seemed too eratic on stage and a little too dippy for my liking. Katherine is a sweet girl but I see her acting and doing broadway type things. She could do very well.

I am ok with Taylor and Elliott but just do not see them as actual idols. There is a market niche for these two, but not in the radio hits capacity such that Kelly Clarkson has had.

Chris had the packaging, the sex appeal and the voice. Such a damn shame the last of the hotties have been voted off!! Oh well Katherine is still a hottie....but you know what I mean!! *wink*

What to post??!!

2006-05-08T13:41:00.000-04:00

Good lord it has been almost a month since my last posting. I don't feel like I have much to say. Everything is beginning to seem routine again, very busy too.

Work is going well, a little slower than I would have liked, but it is a good thing to have extra training. It is always hard to be the new person and it seems doublely so when working with mostly women. Women can be very chatty and very catty....something I have never been to good at dealing with. I am more of an upfront, underdog, standup to the big guy, kinda girl. Not too big of issues at the moment and feel like I handled myself very professional and diplomatically on this front last week. So this week is starting off fresh and with a different perspective for me and I think for several co-workers. It is all for the better and I am glad.

I am back to coaching softball this year and have made some changes in my coaching approach this year. It is still fun, exciting and a thrill when a little girl actually gets a concept and shows improvement. Hubby is helping out again and he is doing well with the girls too. Last year he never said too much but this year he is forced to as we are splitting practices into 2 groups. I really do have to figure out how to get pics up so I can show off our pretty pink shirts this year!! LOL

The kids and I are loving American Idol this season!! I am too hot for Chris....um....yeah....enough of that!!

I peek in on blogs on occassion, but may not reply. Like I said earlier, I just don't have much to say which is a rarity. Still gaining perspective and holding back on things a little. In time I think I will come out of the shell again but for the moment I still feel like I am in a whirlwind that is not slowing down.

The Rock Star is back!!

2006-04-10T12:26:00.000-04:00

Two of my girlfriends and I went to Belltara Casino & Spa this weekend and had a great time!

We arrived at the resort at 1:00 in the afternoon, checked in and headed right for the casino. My friend Andrea is a single mom so Kathy and I were initially on the hunt for cute boys at the black jack tables. No such luck during lunch time at a casino in the middle of nowhere!!

We decided on a $5 table as Kathy has never played black jack. Our dealer, Louie, was a huge jackass. I made a mistake early on and the dude never let up. So my plain was to have fun with my friends and the other players and be as obnoxious as possible. My plan worked and Louie took his break........Bob was an awesome dealer and I proceeded to win $100.00!!

Soon it was spa and massage time and we headed off for the much needed relaxation. I got an upper body massage and petticure. It was heaven and I plan on making this a habit at least once a year! All three of us really enjoyed it and plan on returning.

We only had a so so and dinner and were starved after the spa and vodka in our room. Once we were refreshed the casino and cute boys (for Andrea mind you) were calling us! All in all the gambling for me was fun and I only lost about $25.

I feel like I am getting back to my old self and feeling very happy at the moment. The cycle of the Rock Star will continue, well at least once a year!

Back to work!!

2006-04-05T19:01:00.000-04:00

I am back to work this week. I must say I have a much better attitude and am enjoying going into a non-stressful environment. The ladies I am working with seem to be a good bunch and the woman who is training is a doll. I am still trying to get a handle on personalities so I will reserve judgement on some I have met.

I am currenlty working in our biggest branch office while my branch is being built out to custom. I honestly knew this was the field I was cut out to be in and am anxious to get started. While I am tired and the drive at the moment sucks, being back at a job really makes me feel good. I don't ever think I could just not work unless I had actual babies at home.

We took a family vacation to Georgia and Florida over Spring Break. We left the night of my Granny's funeral. Seemed everyone in my family had vacations and Spring Break at that time. The funeral was sad but was an opportunity to lay her to rest and see our family. My mom is renovating the farm house so that is taking up her time. But I worry about her health now too. Lots of life changes, but I feel good.

I keep saying I am going to keep up more, post more, read more. I have been spending less time on the computer though and I think I am the better for it. I really wish I could meet lots of you, and plan on going to Niagra Falls if at all possible.

Smooches, hugs and huge thanks to all that gave me sympathy about my grandmother.

Death

2006-03-14T12:41:00.000-05:00

My Granny died this a.m., she was 93 years, gave birth to two (2) daughters, witnessed the births of eight (8) grandchildren and fifteen (15) great grandchildren. My Granny was dear to my mom, my aunt and my cousins. Anyone who every met her always had a smile and knew my Granny to be a great lady. She was the last of her generation in our family, outlived her older brothers and sisters, parents, husband and all of her inlaws, friends and cousins.

I will miss you Granny, you gave me such love and devotion amongst all the grandchildren I never really knew I was just one of many.

Love and kisses,

Jenny

Is this an entry?!

2006-02-28T08:39:00.000-05:00

I start my new job on April 1! It is the position that I have hoped for in the last several years. I will be a Branch Manager for several offices of a local Title Company. I am very excited and feel a bit ready for the challenge. The last couple of months off have really helped me and I think I am moving towards who I need to be, or who I think I need to be.

Time to catch up with some of those who have taken the time to be my online friends. See you soon!

Success

2006-02-05T10:33:00.000-05:00

Taking time off and doing almost nothing has been good for my soul. I really have not accomplished much but I feel so much more free than I have in years. I still have the same worries and fears but it is different now.

I am set to get a written job offer from a title company. This is the position that I have wanted for a long time coming. It took me walking away from a previous law firm 2 years ago and doing a job I abhored to come to the realization that 1. I actually liked and 2. was good at being a Real Estate Title Agent. I am so very excited about this opportunity and can finally get away from a law firm atmosphere. Moving on is great and this job is going to present a challenge, a challenge for me to actually be happy and to be helpful to others.

Not all attorneys and others that I have worked with in the past are horrible. It is just such a different environment and just breds discontent and bad feelings. Your employers and co-workers can have a tendency to forget about the real world and those around them. I may be jaded when it comes to this attitude, but so be it.

My blogging has been seriously lacking, I apologize for that. I really need to catch up on everyone. But at the same time, being free from internet life has been a relief as well. The kids have loved having their mommy more often and its been fun to help out at school. I can't say the house is spotless but my brain is all the better for this time.

*smooches* to those that want'em!!!

The Color of My Parachut

2006-01-14T20:05:00.000-05:00

The color, my friends, is a happy one and I would say it is yellow. A bright sunny yellow, at least for the moment.

I am searching for a job, just not very hard. I have decided that January would be for Jen. To hell with what anyone else thinks about what I did or how I handled myself last month. It is today and tomorrow that matters.

Hubby is being infinitely patient and the kids are enjoying me being home. There is a relief I can't explain but only can say that I can smile and feel a little free. Although, I feel the man creeping in on my conciousness and soon need to decide on my path in life.

A huge *hug* to Scott for the title of this post and the prompting of me getting out of my shell. I have a lot to say and need to get cracking.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

2005-12-30T21:26:00.000-05:00

I wish everyone the best in the new year! I am doing well and actually feel pretty good and a bit free. I promise to be back to my blogging self very soon. I miss seeing everyone and enjoying what you have to say. So many inspire me....and huge THANK YOUS for being so supportive.

I quit

2005-12-16T10:13:00.000-05:00

I quit my job. Last week was my last week. I have been home doing all sorts of things and trying to be productive. Life gets squirrely sometimes and I needed a break from the internet for a time. Also, my career has really thrown me into a bit of a stupor the last 2 1/2 years. I finally realized that instead of just sucking it up everyday and being miserable I needed to change my path. So I am not working at the moment. I am applying for different jobs but my heart does not seem to be in it at the moment. My husband is really disappointed because I left a firm that was really good, the whole package. Unfortunately there was no lateral move for me within that firm so I left. Hubby is being supportive and we are financially ok for the moment. However, I am feeling like maybe I should have just sucked it up, kept going blah blah blah. Everyone hates their jobs at some point, no job is perfect and we all have to do things we don't like or enjoy at times. My insecurities have started to leak through and I have been feeling as though I won't come through this happier.

December 7, 1941 continued

2005-12-07T11:05:00.000-05:00

"The 7 December 1941 Japanese raid on Pearl Harbor was one of the great defining moments in history. A single carefully-planned and well-executed stroke removed the United States Navy's Battleship force as a possible threat to the Japanese Empire's southward expansion. America, unprepared and now considerably weakened, was abruptly brought into the Second World War as a full combatant." DEPARTMENT OF THE NAVY -- NAVAL HISTORICAL CENTER

Manhattan, NY December 7, 1941 at 11:45 Eastern Standard time a Hungarian woman who taught herself to speak english was giving birth to a son. This woman was alone at the hospital because her husband was currently stationed in Pearl Harbor. On that day, "a day that will live in infamy" the woman learned that moments after her son was born our nation was under attack.

Sixty-four (64) years ago today our country was taken into history. On this day my family was blessed. My father was born and my grandfather survived Pearl Harbor. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD!

Please take a moment out of your day to remember those Pearl Harbor survivors that are still with us. Very few remain but my heart and thanks go out to them and their families.

December 7, 1941 Battship Row

2005-12-07T11:02:00.000-05:00

What Tree Did You Fall From??

2005-12-05T11:34:00.000-05:00

I am Hazelnut! It fits my personality accurately.

Find your birthday and then find your tree.
Dec 23 to Jan 01 - Apple Tree
Jan 01 to Jan 11 - Fir Tree
Jan 12 to Jan 24 - Elm Tree
Jan 25 to Feb 03 - Cypress Tree
Feb 04 to Feb 08 - Poplar Tree
Feb 09 to Feb 18 - Cedar Tree
Feb 19 to Feb 28 - Pine Tree
Mar 01 to Mar 10 - Weeping Willow Tree
Mar 11 to Mar 20 - Lime Tree
Mar 21 (only) - Oak Tree
Mar 22 to Mar 31 - Hazelnut Tree
Apr 01 to Apr 10 - Rowan Tree
Apr 11 to Apr 20 - Maple Tree
Apr 21 to Apr! 30 - Walnut Tree
May 01 to May 14 - Poplar Tree
May 15 to May 24 - Chestnut Tree
May 25 to Jun 03 - Ash Tree
Jun 04 to Jun 13 - Hornbeam Tree
Jun 14 to Jun 23 -! Fig Tre e
Jun 24 (only) - Birch Tree
Jun 25 to Jul 04 - Apple Tree
Jul 05 to Jul 14 - Fir Tree
Jul 15 to Jul 25 - Elm Tree
Jul 26 to Aug 04 - Cypress Tree
Aug 05 to Aug 13 - Poplar Tree
Aug 14 to Aug 23 - Cedar Tree
Aug 24 to Sep 02 - Pine Tree
Sep 03 to Sep 12 - Weeping Willow Tree
Sep 13 to Sep 22 - Lime Tree
Sep 23 (only) - Olive Tree
Sep 24 to Oct 03 - Hazelnut Tree
Oct 04 to Oct 13 - Rowan Tree
Oct 14 to Oct 23 - Maple Tree
Oct 24 to Nov 11 - Walnut Tree
Nov 12 to Nov 21 - Chestnut Tree
Nov 22 to Dec 01 - Ash Tree
Dec 02 to Dec 11 - Hornbeam Tree
Dec 12 to Dec 21 - Fig Tree
Dec 22 (only) - Beech Tree

YOUR TREE MEANS : (in alphabetical order)
Apple Tree (the Love) -- quiet and shy at times, lots of charm, appeal, and attraction, pleasant attitude, flirtatious smile, adv enturous, sensitive, loyal in love, wants to love and be loved, faithful and tender partner, very generous, many talents, loves children, needs affectionate partner.

Ash Tree (the Ambition) -- extremely attractive, vivacious, impulsive, demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent, talented, likes to play with fate, can be very egotistic, reliable, restless lover, sometimes money rules over the heart, demands attention, needs love and much emotional support.

Beech Tree (the Creative) -- has good taste, concerned about its looks, materialistic! , good organization of life and career, economical, good leader, takes no unnecessary risks, reasonable, splendid lifetime companion, keen on keeping fit (diets, sports, etc.).

Birch Tree (the inspiration) -- vivacious, attractive, elegant, friendly, unpretentious, modest, does not like anything in excess, abhors the vulgar, loves life in nature and in calm, not very passionate, full of imagination, little ambition, creates a calm and content atmosphere.

Cedar Tree (the Confidence! ) -- of rare strength, knows how to adapt, likes unexpected presents, of good health, not in the least shy, tends to look down on others, self-confident, a great speaker, determined, often impatient, likes to impress others, has many talents, industrious, healthy optimism, waits for the one true love, able to make quick decisions.

Chestnut Tree (the Honesty) -- of unusual stature, impressive, well-developed sense of justice, fun to be around, a planner, born diplomat, can be irritated easily, sensitive of others feelings, hard worker, sometimes acts superior, feels not understood at times, fiercely family oriented, very loyal in love, physically fit.

Cypress Tree (the Faithfulness) -- strong, muscular, adaptable, takes what life has to give but doesn't necessarily like it, strives to be content, optimistic, wants to be financially independent, wants love and affection, hates loneliness, passionate lover which cannot be satisfied, faithful, quick-tempered at times, can be unruly and careless, loves to gain knowledge, needs to be needed.

Elm Tree (the Noble-mindedness) -- pleasant shape, tasteful clothes, modest demands, tends not to forgive mistakes, cheerful, likes to lead but not to obey, honest and faithful partner, likes making decisions for others, noble-minded, generous, good sense of humor, practical.

Fig Tree (the Sensibility) -- very strong minded, a bit self-willed, honest, loyal, independent, hates contradiction or arguments, hard worker when wants to be, loves life and friends, enjoys children and animals, few sexual relationships, great sense of humor, has artistic ta! lent and great intelligence.

Fir tree (the Mysterious) -- extraordinary taste, handles stress well, loves anything beautiful, stubborn, tends to care for those close to them, hard to trust others, yet a social butterfly, likes idleness and laziness after long demanding hours at work, rather modest, talented, unselfish, many friends, very reliable.

Hazelnut Tree (the Extraordinary) -- charming, sense of humor, very demanding but can also be very understanding, knows how to make a lasting impression, active fighter for social causes a! nd polit ics, popular, quite moody, sexually oriented, honest, a perfectionist, has a precise sense of judgment and expects complete fairness.

Hornbeam Tree (the Good Taste) -- of cool beauty, cares for its looks and condition, good taste, is not egoistic, makes life as comfortable as possible, leads a reasonable and disciplined life, looks for kindness and acknowledgment in an emotional partner, dreams of unusual lovers, is seldom happy with its feelings, mistrusts most people, is never sure of its decisions, very conscientious.

Lime Tree (the Doubt) -- inte lligent, hard working, accepts what life dishes out, but not before trying to change bad circumstances into good ones, hates fighting and stress, enjoys getaway vacations, may appear tough, but is actually soft and relenting, always willing to make sacrifices for family and friends, has many talents but not always enough time to use them, can become a complainer, great leadership qualities, is jealous at times but extremely loyal.

Maple Tree (Independence of Mind) -- no ordinary person, full of imagination and orig! inality, shy and reserved, ambitio! us, proud, self-confident, hungers for new experiences, sometimes nervous, has many complexities, good memory, learns easily, complicated love life, wants to impress.

Oak Tree (the Brave) -- robust nature, courageous, strong, unrelenting, independent, sensible, does not like change, keeps its feet on the ground, person of action.

Olive Tree (the Wisdom) -- loves sun, warmth and kind feelings, reasonable, balanced, avoids aggression and violence, tolerant, cheerful, calm, well-developed sense of justice, sensitive, empathetic, free of jealousy, loves to read and the company of sophisticated people.

Pine Tree (the Peacemaker) -- loves agreeable company, craves peace and harmony, loves to help others, active imagination, likes to write poetry, not fashion conscious, great compassion, friendly to all, falls strongly in love but will leave if betrayed or lied to, emotionally soft, humble, needs affection and reassurance.

Poplar Tree (the Uncertainty) -- looks very decorative, talent! ed, not<> very self-con! fident, extremely courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and pleasant surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity, great artistic nature, good organizer, tends to lean toward philosophy, reliable in any situation, takes partnership seriously.

Rowan Tree (the Sensitivity) -- full of charm, cheerful, gifted without egoism, likes to draw attention, loves life, motion, unrest, and even complications, is both dependent and independent, good taste, artistic, passionate, emotional, good company, does not forgive.

Walnut Tree (the Passion) -- unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egotistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate, no compromise.

Weeping Willow (the Melancholy) --likes to be stress free, loves family life, full of hopes and dreams, attractive, very empathetic, loves anything beautiful, musically inclined, loves to travel to exotic places, restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with when pressured, sometimes demanding, good intuition, suffers in love until they find that one loyal, steadfast partner; loves to make others laugh.

Dead Celebrity Auctions

2005-12-02T11:10:00.000-05:00

I understand the whole idea behind owning a piece of history or something treasured by one's idol. Personally I think it would be pretty neat to own a book signed by Jackie Kennedy. But for me it goes beyond the pale when you want to purchase someone's toliet.

It seems that Jerry Garcia's dishwasher, toliet and other appliances will be auctioned off by a non-profit group named the Sophia Foundation. While I commend the families of many celebrities who auction off items for charity, it just seems odd to me that someone would actually want Jerry Garcia's toliet or even his dishwasher. I mean really are you going to use those things? Or would you build a shrine with pictures, autographs and other memorabilia surrounding that toliet to comemorate your most favored hero? I suppose having any piece of Jerry will do for some folks.

And for something different.....

2005-11-29T12:28:00.000-05:00

I am bored. I should not be but I am. Most of you are pretty upfront and give lots of information about yourselfs in your blogs. I also know quite a few of you from that other place so I have a few details about you from there.

However, I want everyone to tell me ONE thing about themselves that I would never get from reading your blog. I know there are MeMes out there that are similar to what I am asking for but not all of you participate in those.

Even if you are a first time reader to my little piece of blog world I want to hear about YOU! Now post something damnit....I am bored!

My Harry Potter Match (I am such a geek)

2005-11-28T15:59:00.000-05:00

Cedric DiggoryYou love the clean-cut, all around good boy. He
always does the right thing and makes your time
together romantic and special. He's a dream
come true, and handsome to boot!

Who is your Harry Potter love match? (for girls)
brought to you by

Stephen Tyler, among other things!

2005-11-22T10:01:00.000-05:00

Stephen Tyler can still rock and Joe Perry can still roll. Boy do these dudes look old....lol. Areosmith and Lenny both were awesome. We went to dinner before the show and downed several jello shots. I think my jello shot days are just about numbered, its time for Jen to stop thinking she is a pseudo-rock girl.

The whole weekend was loads of fun. I will let Friday night speak for itself in the below post, um yeah was feeling good!

Saturday was a great day as the BUCKEYES won big! YAY!

Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire is by far the best of the four (4) in the series. The director, Mike Newell, handled the teenage angst with a terrific amount of humor that lead to the heart breaking and frightening ending. I was a little worried about how scared the children would be but they handled it great. My son absolutely loved the dragon scenes and I must admit they did a heck of a job on the special effects. I have heard lots of people complain about the score but I thought it fit the mood perfectly. As always it was fun to see how far Dan Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson have grown physically and in their acting range. Dan has come the furthest and it really shows at the end of the movie. There was a lot to cover in this film and not everything adheres to the book. But being a true fan I really did enjoy the movie and how the producers adapted it to the screen. They took the best material and made it come alive.

We are currently without internet at home as we are having hardwood floors laid throughout our downstairs area. It appears that the floors will not be completed before Thanksgiving day. This means that we will be eating in our basement on card tables....lol...I find this sort of funny. I know if this had happened in years past I would be throwing a hissy fit at hubby for his poor timing in scheduling the installation. But in all fairness, the floor is looking good and I left the decision to my husband. Life is to short to get worked up about the dinner, it will get made, the kids will enjoy a Thanksgiving picnic in our finished basement and it can be informal for a change. I just want to have fun and be happy this week.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!

Drunk, lost at poker and went dancing!

2005-11-19T01:41:00.000-05:00

The title says it all does it not?! Goodness, I am not a rock star and some of these "clubs" are too young for me! lol

So I did not take any money tonight, total bummer. However, we did go out afterward, dancing, and had a great time. I think hubby is a bit pissed, but meh....he will get over it right? Me, it is 1:42 a.m. and I don't really want to go to bed. So I will visit your blogs and reek havoc!

*smooches* to peeps!

Harry Potter, GO BUCKEYES, Pink Poker Party and Areosmith!!

2005-11-18T09:17:00.000-05:00

Whew I have a lot to say today. And yes, I know I owe stories of the wild reunion weekend. I am working on that post.

YAY the new Harry Potter movie is out today! Although I will not get to see it tonight with the other HP geek masses I plan on taking the kiddos tomorrow....maybe....if OHIO STATE is kicking the ass of the team up north! Hubby is going to a Michigan Party and I have graciously accepted that I need to stay home with the kids. It appears that we have had a lot of adult fun filled weekends in the past couple of months and that our children actually need some attention. I do not take missing this particular Ohio State game lightly. So in the years to come I will mercilessly remind my children of what I had to give up for them. The same way my parents tortured me....um....well not really tortured as my parents usually went to every game without fail which meant I got to spend time with my cousins. OH..............IO I will end this little tribute of our devotion to Ohio State by repeating what my daughter said to me this morning "GO BUCKS, MICHIGAN SUCKS, WE HAVE THE POWER TO KICK THEIR BUTTS!"

Tonight I am participating in a Pink Poker Party. What is this you may ask. It is an all female texas hold'em tournament. We will be dressing in our finest pink attire, with matching tierras, pink jewelry and all other manner of prissy pinkness we can come up with. All this really means is that I get to wear a tierra while playing poker, drinking lots of alcohol and taking my friends money. I am very excited at this prospect.

One of the other reasons why I am staying home with the kiddos on Saturday is because we are attending the Aerosmith/Lenny Kravitz concert on Sunday night. My dad has agreed to watch the princess and prince. Thank goodness for my dad! I think it was all the torture they put me through while he and my mom were attending OSU games that makes him feel obligated. We are having dinner with two other couples and then driving to the show. I am also very excited for Sunday night as I have wanted to see both acts for a very long time. Not to mention Lenny Kravitz....mrrrrrow HOT and I get to almost party like a Rock Star again!

Have a great weekend everyone!! I almost forgot......*SMOOCHES* GLOWIE AND CONGRATS!

Question Day!

2005-11-15T09:42:00.000-05:00

Alright, now is your chance. Ask me a question, any question and I will answer it. Your questions and my answers may even spark a good story or just make you pee your pants laughing.

Come on...I know you want to know!!! lol

Links

2005-11-10T09:23:00.000-05:00

There are quite a few people who comment here and have blogs that I read that I do not have linked over to the side. I would just like a blanket permission to go ahead a link you folks. And please know that I may not comment but I am reading your blogs. Everyone provides such great insights and laughter for me and I am not sure how I would make it through some days without having you people around to entertain me!!

And I promise to get writing here again soon. I have some lovely ideas but putting them together coherently some days is a task.

*smooches* kiddos!

This and that update

2005-11-03T10:14:00.000-05:00

My kiddos were sick this week. Princess had strep and prince has had this yucky cough for 3 weeks now. So off to the doctor we went. Both are on antibiotics and feeling better and back at school.

Halloween was lots of fun. My dad took the day off so he could be with the kids and hand out the candy. In my family it is a tradition to scare the piss out of eachother. My uncle used to love to do this to our family at various times. My dad waited for Princess and her friends to get off the school bus. He was dressed in all black with a covered face. I warned my neighbor, who is a police officer, that dad was going to do this. So all the kids get off the bus and dad comes out from behind neighbor's house and sends the kids flying in all directions. About gave the bus driver a heart attack! LOL And my daughter....she stood there, put her hands on her hips, and said aww Grandpa stop scaring everyone! LOL Busted!

As for an update on my reunion, I am getting there. I really want to post some pics of that and the kids. I promise I will get to it soon.

Big Sisters

2005-10-25T10:48:00.000-04:00

I hope that my children will continue to grow and love eachother the way they do today or last night for that matter.

From the time I got home from work until my children went to bed, the girl and boy, princess and prince, played together, happily. They shared toys with eachother and big sister lead little brother around on an imaginary journey.

At one point, while daughter was taking a bathroom break, the little prince came to me and asked to sit on my lap. He was so adorable and sweet and was telling me what he and his sister were up to. I whispered to him how lucky he is to have a big sister like princess and he said "yes, I know that mommy!" Princess yelled for her brother because she had something new to show him and he ran off to join his heroine.

My boy does almost nothing without his sister. She is a huge part of his life and he is the same for her. My girl is sweet to him even when his four year old terror and temper come out. While everything else in the world may have seemed gloomy yesterday, my children truly made me smile and be glad. They made eachother happy and I hope that they can continue to do so throughout their lifetime. I have seen so many siblings grow distant and angry with eachother and that truly makes me sad. Speaking as an only child it touches my heart to see my children love eachother. One of my many hopes as a parent is to foster that love so they will always have family.

Look what I did!!

2005-10-21T15:14:00.000-04:00

http://www.realityracingtv.com

I submitted my application today! Insane, maybe, any chance they will actually contact me, doubtful. But I just had to put in an application. HA could you imagine....hey a girl has to have a dream right??

David's Theme Song

2005-10-19T09:50:00.000-04:00

Don't wanna wait 'til you know me better
Let's just be glad for the time together
Life's such a treat and it's time you taste it
There ain't a reason on earth to waste it
It ain't a crime to be good to yourself

Chorus: Lick it up, lick it up, it's only right now
Lick it up, lick it up, ooh yeah Lick it up,
lick it up, come on, come on Lick it up, lick it up

Don't need to wait for an invitation
You gotta live like you're on vacation
There's something sweet you can't buy with money
- lick it up, lick it up
It's all you need, so believe me honey
It ain't a crime to be good to yourself

chorus Come on - it's only right now (it's only right now)
Ooh yeah (ooh yeah) ooh yeah (ooh yeah),
yeah yeah chorus repeats outsong

"Lick It Up" from album "THE VERY BEST OF KISS"

Not only did I get lips I got tongue as well. Lots of tongue jabbing at my mouth demanding entrance. Needless to say I was horrified, but I complied. It felt as though a very wet snake had snuck up on me while I was sleeping.

When David finally decided he needed air I was ready to run. One look from Sonia though kept me still. Everyone in that tire was waiting for my reaction and David seemed expectant. All I could think of was "can you kiss me a little slower this time, and with not so much tongue?" David actually smiled and said sure. This time when he kissed me it was sweet little pecks and a bit more relaxed exploring of eachother's mouths. What started out to be incredibly gross ended up being my starting ground for practicing the fine art of kissing boys and telling them how I like things done.

David and I were boyfriend and girlfriend into the summer that year. However, he moved away, out of Ohio, and we only wrote once or twice the next school year. I also found out that Sonia and I were the only two girls in our class to actually have frenched kissed boys. I learned a great deal that summer and my exploration of french kissing boys on the playground would not stop there. It seems I had received a bit of a reputation for knowing how to kiss properly. I am sure David made many of his future girl friends very happy and I like to think it all started with me asking for that sweet, tongueless, kiss.

20 year High School class reunion

2005-10-14T11:56:00.000-04:00

No old jokes!!! I graduated in 19...19...1985!

The party starts tonight with a pre-party gathering at BW3s. I will be meeting my bestest girlfriends, sans husbands, to ridicule all our old classmates. Nah thats not true, Koko was friends with just about everyone and can't wait to possibly see some buds that I have not seen since graduation. Or at least since my last party when I left for college!

No kids either this weekend so I will be able to have wild rock star stories for you on Monday! HA lets get real here....I am old!

Things you learn on the Bus

2005-10-10T13:55:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Master for the reminder of how much sex education can be learned on a school bus.

Thursday night while out to dinner with hubby and our two children, my little princess says to me "guess what a 5th grader did on the bus today?" I knew it was bound to happen and quickly looked at my husband who had my father's "oh boy" look on his face.

I smiled, really wanted to laugh, and asked her what she saw. "Eric kissed Ashley in the very back seat!" Well this news sent my little princess and the little prince (who is all of four) into giggles. My husband is "what, what are they doing on that bus!" I thought the whole thing was priceless and went into a discussion about where did Eric kiss Ashley and was informed on her cheek. I kept the whole conversation very light hearted, but my husband, he will be having heart failure when our daughter hits 13!

To all our Canadian friends...

2005-10-10T09:27:00.000-04:00

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

Celebrity crush!!!

2005-10-05T09:28:00.000-04:00

Vince Vaughn is in town today, he is doing a comedy troupe touring show! I never heard of this until a radio interview this a.m.

Should I *stalk* him....good lord that man is funny!

KISS, The Rock Group

2005-09-30T15:57:00.000-04:00

David H. loved KISS, was a huge fan, carried drum sticks around with him everywhere. David and his best friend, Craig, would wear their faces painted once a month fashioned after Gene Simmons and Peter Criss. The girls loved those two boys and they were always a topic during the "cool" circle group time.

That same Spring that Sonia had decided on her mission she told me that David H. liked me. My hair was finally growing out of the Dorothy Hamil and I was catching up as to what music was hip. KISS was high on the list of most favorite bands thanks to "Beth I hear you calling". Craig and David wanted us to meet them after school one day so David could ask me to "go with him." Once again innocent Jen was in shock. "But Sonia I ride the Bus home and my mom calls at 3:30 to make sure I made it." "So what" was Sonia's response, "everyone thinks David is cute and he likes YOU!" Peer pressure is a mighty force mixed with the excitement of a cute boy saying he likes you. I was totally intoxicated and let my friend talk me into meeting with David. Sonia and I developed a plan whereby we would convince our mothers that I would go home with Sonia after school on Friday, go skating and spend the night at her house. That would leave us free to meet the boys after school, on the play ground, inside the big tractor tires.

I was incredibly nervous, enough to puke up lunch if I had eaten lunch that day. I don't think I said two words to anyone, but it seemed that our entire class knew we were meeting the boys after school and they were trying to get me to talk about it.

David likend himself after Peter Criss, however, he was more like Gene Simmons and I was about to find out how so in that tire. Being one of the original lachkey kids, I had my house key around my neck. So when stepping into the tire it swung down as we all had to hunch over. This was the closest I had ever been to a boy other than my Dad and I was about to pass out. David told me how cute I was and asked me "will you go with me?" All I could do was smile and said shyly YES. I knew it was coming but no one could have prepared me for what happened next.

The Bases

2005-09-28T13:15:00.000-04:00

Kissing, why are they talking about kissing? What the heck is being frenched, oh god don't ask me, DON'T ASK ME! Mr. Codria saved me and told the girls it was time to break into our math groups. After this encounter I was in shock, confused and totally bewildered at the meanings behind the terms frenching and being felt up.

At the age of ten my parents were still the center of my universe. I did the only thing I could, being the curious type and one who cannot keep her mouth shut. It was at the dinner table when I blurted out "I need to know the bases!" My parents glanced at eachother with a strained perplexed look that clearly read our daughter is losing her mind. My Mom proceeds to ask why on earth I am asking about softball and basics I already know. My ten year old mind is trying to come up with an excuse. I made the decision to tell my parents about the discussion the girls had earlier that day. "Oh Boy" says my dad and he leaves the table. That is the night I had my first real sexual talk with my Mom. I learned what french kissing was all about and that boys actually like to feel your boobs. I distinctly remember being appalled and then saying "you mean dad touches your boobs??!!" At that point my Mom bursts out laughing and I can hear my Dad downstairs again saying "Oh Boy!" Mom gets me giggling and admits she had no clue what the bases actually were but began a discussion with me regarding what she knew. Going to bed that night I felt more knowledgeable and ready to face the girls. But was I really ready to face future questioning about if I had ever been kissed?

As the school year moved forward and the seasons were changing so was I. I was starting to leave my dolls behind and really noticing what boys were all about. I was going to the roller rink, the movies and having a great time with my new best friend. The cool circle group still discussed boys on a regular basis and how far everyone had gotten. I had escaped scrutiny until one Spring morning. My friend Sonia asked me straight out if I had ever kissed a boy. I think my ears were the color of blood but I answered honestly. Afterall, this was the only real friend I had made so far and felt safe. It was a wise choice, Sonia was a good friend and did not laugh or make fun of me. She only decided to make it her mission to see that I got my first kiss and protect me from the perceived cool crowd.

Thought excersise

2005-09-23T13:29:00.000-04:00

I stole this from somewhere...been meaning to post it for awhile.

You can travel backward in time and relive any three days (3 opportunities @ 1 day per -- not necessarily a single three day stretch, although that's OK if you want) in earth's history.

You will be impervious to harm and invisible to the participants. You can't change history. Also, you can never disclose or otherwise use anything you learn for financial gain (e.g. your motives should not be financial or personal gain -- rather curiosity, aestheticism, seeing your wife's sister in the shower when she was 17, etc., etc.)

So what three days do you pick? You have only 60 seconds to decide. Begin.

Tagged by GK

2005-09-21T14:15:00.000-04:00

7 things I plan to do before I die:

-See my children into adulthood (that being careers, signficant others, grandchildren, good/happy lives)
-Travel to Hungary and make contact with any realtives still alive
-Travel to Hawaii for a 2nd honeymoon
-Learn to play an instrument
- play golf
-drive a race car
-beat my husband at Stratego

7 things I can do:

-speed read
-talk like an acutioneer
-cook like my grandmothers
-make my children feel love
-catch a 90 mile per hour pitched baseball
-multi task
-day dream

7 things I cannot do:

-run
-sing
-stand on my head
-play piano
-eat tomatos
-watch horros movies
-spit

7 things that attract me to another person:

-beautiful eyes
-good sense of humor
-kissable lips
-ability to listen
-ability to have empathy and understanding
-love of children
-adventursome

7 things I say most often:

-good gravy
-shit
-I am going to count to 5!
-oh please
-woo hoo
-how are you and mean it
-shit (I know but 7 is a hard number)

7 celebrity crushes:

-Billy Joe Armstrong
-Johnny Resnick
-Will Smith
-Jon Bon Jovi
-David Cassidy
-Vince Vaughn
-Scott Baio

I would do the tag thing but it appears almost everyone else has performed this little task, however, EmRugBurn does not get off the hook so easy...update girl!

First Kiss

2005-09-15T11:35:00.000-04:00

I was just a child when I had my first kiss and so innocent. Many of us were they same way, a chaste kiss to the cheek or quick peck on the lips is usually the way a first kiss occurs. In the life of Jen, not so.

In the fourth grade I lived in the main City School District here. I was blissfully innocent in regard to boys. Oh sure they chased us and we played Charlie's Angels, but we never went beyond "oh Billy Joe is soooo cute!" By the fourth grade most of us were starting to wear training bras and a few girls had the all out snap in the back bra. We knew our bodies were changing but did not go beyond giggling about little girl things. I was still into the Muppets and Kermit the Frog at that point in my life.

Then we moved. My father switched from the EPA to Rockwell International and my parents felt it was time we moved to the suburbs and into a bigger home. The transition was difficult for me and it did not help that my mom decided this was the time to cut my hair ala Dorothy Hamill. Starting fifth grade and the first two weeks of school were hard. Hard is such an understatement for a pubescent ten year old girl. I was behind academically and, it became obvious to me, socially as well. These kids seemed to be light years beyond my knowledge about everything, music, boys, homework. I was finally befriended by Sonia and other girls came around to me once they learned I played softball.

One afternoon, during free time, five of us girls were sitting on the carpeted bean bag "cool" area. I was tragically unhip and was only beginning to understand what "cool" was. I was still new to all that was around me and to these girl's social circle. I remember Lisa distinctly stating "lets talk about the bases!" I was excited and thought "finally, something I know about, softball and baseball."

I sent my baby off!

2005-09-13T09:39:00.000-04:00

Today was my boy's first day of Pre-School. He will be attending this P-S on Tuesdays and Thursdays a full day. We picked out his outfit, packed his backpack, hugged and kissed his sister as she was catching the bus and off we went.

I was all smiles and excitement for my baby. He is a shy boy and does not like large crowds with lots of noise. Little prince surprised me upon entering the school. The lady at the front desk said his name and greeted prince with a warm hello. Prince responded back with a big HI and a wave. The lady smiled and said how wonderful he is not shy. Mommy was delighted and a bit relieved!

Prince's neighbor boy friend "Sammie" will also be attending Pre-School on the same days as him. Thank the stars that Sammie was already in the gym and had started P-S last week! We greeted Prince's teachers and they showed us the classrooms the preschoolers would be using. Sammie went along and was the tour guide extraordinre. Several other little boys had come to say hello to little Prince and he was well on his way to making new friends.

Once we returned to the gym I announced to Prince that it was time Mommy went to work. I asked him for our ritual goodbye "kissy and huggies". I bent down and he whispered "just huggies Mommy."

And the hits keep happening

2005-09-12T10:57:00.000-04:00

I am usually one that can buck up and keep going. But as the title of this post indicates my family gets hit again. My mom takes care of my 93 year old granny. Granny fell this weekend and broke her pelvis and cut her head open (30 stitches). It happened at 6:30 a.m. while she was getting out of bed. My mom had a hell of time getting her up off the floor and the bleeding stopped.

My mom has a sister that leaves in the same city as me. She has not been down to check on my mom and granny. My frustration is through the roof but my mother has asked me to hold back and just help in getting the arrangements in place for my granny to return to the nursing home here. Granny spent last winter (Sept through April) at this wonderful nursing home but wanted to return home for the summer.

I am having a difficult time dealing with my emotions. That helplessness is creeping back in today, I feel selfish and just want to break down and scream. Or just eat a pint of ice cream. I hate being an adult!

Katrina Timeline

2005-09-09T09:55:00.000-04:00

From Wheezus!
http://thinkprogress.org/katrina-timeline

On the lighter side of things

2005-09-08T10:08:00.000-04:00

1.What is the most adventurous thing you have ever done to your hair?
I had to cut it in high school really short. I hated my Senior pics and you can tell by the look on my face. I always had long hair except when my mom made me get the Dorothy Hamill cut and then the high school fiasco. That is why I don't stray too far from what I like.

2.Who gave you your name, and how did they choose it? My parents could not decide so they put three sets of names in a hat and pulled one. Hence I became a Jen.

3.What gives you the creeps? Spiders...ewww....*shudder*

4.What relative do you most resemble in personality? This is a tough one. I would say my mom and my godmother/auntie. I am becoming too much like my mom in my parenting skills and I need to work on that a bit. There is quite a bit a disagree with when it comes to how she disciplined me in childhood and what sometimes I catch myself doing with my kids. My auntie and I shared a lot of the same beliefs and she was my 2nd mom. I got my temper from her and it seems she and my mom shared the same sense of humor. I got that from both.

5.How did you come up with the name of your blog? Does it mean anything, or is it nonsense? *giggles* This started as a place for me to come and moan about how I felt ignored and that no one listened to me. I literally talk to myself frequently and thought this would be a place just for me to get out some emotions. It quickly became something more and I am glad for that. I have met some great people and I am able to continue online friendships through this blog. Plus I can be a huge DAW sometimes so that is a bonus. I think I should rename this thing "Laughing at Myself" which I tend to do a lot.

Life and Katrina

2005-09-07T09:13:00.000-04:00

I have been a blog ho this week. I have visited many blogs and read many different opinions about the Hurricane relief effort. I am saddened and angry about the whole situation and hate the feeling of helplessness that has engulfed my life in the last two weeks. I watched the destruction while sitting next to my mother's hospital bed for four days. I listened to Doctors, Nurses and all other manner of hospital employees despair over the situation in our Gulf region. Collections were being taken up immediately and from my Mom's hospital bed she wrote a check. "We do what we can Jenny and keep moving forward".

Ah she called me "Jenny". That does not happen often, mostly when she is scared, worried or upset. That is my little girl name and it bothered me that my mom was truly scared. So I have bottled up my helplessness, put on the stern face of an adult, and am moving forward. We can't change what happened last week only make things better today and for the future.

Give what support you can and speak out to make things better. We need to be a strong nation, united in how we approach the future. I am impressed and amazed at the outpouring of concern shown in so many blogs. It gives me hope and assured me that I am not helpless, either in my personal life or in my community.

Heart Attack

2005-09-01T09:12:00.000-04:00

My mom had a heart attack on Monday. She is doing well and is now resting comfortably at home. She is one of the luckiest woman I know. She had one blocked artery and had a heart cath and stint put in. There is no damage to her heart muscle or other arteries. Needless to say this has been a stressful week and I need some rest myself.

I am back at work and will be glad to read some of my favorite blogs. My friends here are extremely entertaining and continue to lift my spirits when I feel down. If I don't say it enough thank you all for sharing so much of yourself.

P.S. My mom and I have a quirky sense of humor when it comes to stressful situations. So Monday night while I was on the phone with my mom and the squad was just arriving she said "Don't kill yourself to get down here Mario!" Only my mom would remind me about that, and it was such a huge coincidence that I had written out the Mario story here that I had the chance to laugh at a moment when I was very frightened.

The Chase

2005-08-26T14:50:00.000-04:00

I had three girls screaming at me all at once. I yelled at my friends to shut up, buckle up and let me think. I was in fast forward mode and was squealing tires out of the parking lot. My goal was not to get trapped by the four cars that were pursuing us.

"T" was rational enough to make a few suggestions. "Just drive to your house, your mom will take care of it!" Oh yeah, like I am going to let these yahoos know where I live so that I may be tormented forever! "Ok, go to the police station, they won't follow us there!" Alright another brilliant idea! And what will we tell the police??!! Excuse us but we were just in a fight at another high school and now those bad kids are following us. I was not in the mood to get caught, suspended, volleyball career over, and the possible grounding that would come from my parents.

During this sarcasm laded conversation, I am flying through the backroads of small town Ohio just to get to the freeway unscathed. If I could just get someplace I knew, the idiots chasing us would not have a chance. So where does a novice teenage girl like myself decide is her turf? The mall. I know every inch of every street surrounding our local mall. If I was going to lose those turdwhackers I was going to have to drive to someplace I could get to quickly. By this point my speeding is raising the alarm in my two friends in the back seat and they are begging me to just stop or go home. No way, those two idiot girls started us on this path and I was not going to turn back. "T's" response "Alright Mario, but could you please slow down a little!"

During the small town Ohio chase I was able to lose two of the cars following us. I still had two cars hot on my tail and knew I was pushing the limits of how fast I had ever driven, let alone the speed at which I knew the Mustang could go. The mall exist was coming up fast and I had to make an on the spot decision. One of the cars was right behind me and I was in the far left lane, cruising at about 80. Checking my mirrors I decided I could beat the Semitruck in the right lane just in time to hit the exit. I gunned it and made a sweeping move across the lanes and made the off ramp just in time. The car behind me had no choice but to keep on going. That left one car, a Firebird, that was still giving chase. That boy could see what was happening and reacted by hitting the off ramp right behind me.

I was starting to panic thinking I am never going to lose this guy. I decided to turn into the mall parking lot knowing that the mall was closed. If I could get through the lot and hit the other side leading to some neighborhood we could park undetected. No such luck as the Firebird dude was hot on my ass.

I learned from my two cousins that when in a fight or flight situation sometimes turning around and going to the fight might work to your advantage. I had seen them do this while playing chicken on four wheelers. It only took about 5 seconds for me to decide to turn that steering wheel leading me into a 180 towards our pursuer. The Firebird dude never knew what hit him as he attempted to follow suit and crashed into a lamp post.

And that started my career as Mario aka Koko the international race car driver.

Pain

2005-08-24T10:25:00.000-04:00

Geez you would think I have not gone through giving birth or had a bunch of surgeries in the past three years. I have been so whiney with this back stuff this week I almost can't stand myself!

I went to the Chiro yesterday afternoon and he did an adjust and gave me a treatment for the sciatic nerve problem. That helped a bit and I am going back again tomorrow. I am able to walk a little better but still feel and look crooked.

Tonight my friend and I are taking our daughters to the Hilary Duff concert. Oh boy....as if having this hurt back was making me feel old, now I am going to this concert with my 8 year old and goodness knows how many other young screaming fan girls. I think I should have gotten prescription drugs instead of an adjust. This coming from the woman who loved Green Day. You would think I could handle a little pain and Hilary Duff.

My princess is so excited though so being the best mommy I can I smiled this morning, helped her get her outfit together and took her to the sitter's where she immediately began talking about what to do with her hair. Um, is she still 8? Really, she is so cute about the whole thing and I had to explain at least three times that she would not really get to meet Hilary or maybe not even see her that well. We will be taking the binoculars so hopefully she will not be too disappointed.

Oh and GK, icey hot next to the bed!! LOL It ws all the walking and rollar coasters people...I am old!

Ouch Ouch Ouch

2005-08-22T10:31:00.000-04:00

I threw out my back over the weekend! I am home from work today as I can hardly walk. I was in bed all day yesterday and even cried when I got stuck in the kitchen. I will resume my normal blogging routine once I feel better. I have tried to read a few this morning but it hurts too much to sit here.

And no jokes about how exactly I threw out my back since this was our "couple" weekend!

Racing

2005-08-18T11:55:00.000-04:00

Like my cousins and my parents before me, I had a bug. A bug that just cannot allow me to drive the speed limit, under most any circumstance. I was known to "drag" anyone, anywhere, at any time. Once upon a time my dream was to become a race car driver. As you can see that actually went no where, but I digress.

Mario Andretti and his team were very popular during my rein as international racing star Koko. Guys would actually put money on me to take out whatever dude thought their "Z" or Camero could out race the chick in the "Stang". Standard is the only way to go and on a straight stretch with a couple of curves, easy money. But it did take a little time for me to earn this reputation.

On the night I was dubbed "Mario" my friends and I went to a basketball game, at an opposing school whom our high school was not playing. My Mother thought it would be harmless for me to have the Mustang on a Tuesday night to drive to a basketball game. Little did my Mom know we were going to this game to scope out what a friend's boyfriend was doing on the sly.

We arrive at the game just before halftime, pay our way in and are standing out in the lobby of the gym. It was extremely crowded and loud as this game was important to both schools. Two of my friends had wandered away from "T" and I while we were jabbering away about typical teenage girl stuff. Next thing I know "T" makes me turn around to see our two friends are having a bit of a shouting match with some girls from the home school. Being the good friends "T" and I were we skip on over to the action and are listening intently. My usual reaction in these situations is to giggle as all the arguing over a boy was intensely stupid. During my gigglefest I am tapped on the shoulder and as I turn around I was immediately assaulted by a punch in the stomach. I think there is something about my giggle that must be irritating. The night just got plain ugly from there, especially since we were not at OUR own high school, I had my varsity jacket on, and some teachers were making their way towards us. "T" was all about dragging me out of there (had a Volleyball game on Thursday) and all four of us proceeded to run to the car.

Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think that those girls, with their own boyfriends in tow, would follow us! And chase us they did.

Nicknames and Driving

2005-08-16T12:45:00.000-04:00

Over the years I have had many nicknames. There are always the pet names your parents give you and there are the embarrassing ones that childhood friends attach to you for various reasons. There are three nicknames that have stuck with me into adulthood. Jenny, Koko and Mario.

I started out this life as "Jenny" and have always despised this name. Not sure why, I was just never a "Jenny" in my mind. The only people to call me this are my closest relatives and when I hear that name I turn into my 10 year old self. That is never a good sign, is it? It is mainly my seven (7) cousins, whom I grew up with and remain fairly close to, that call me by this nickname. Two (2) of these cousins showed me how to drive, operate a tractor, maneuver a three wheeler and mini-bike (motorcycle). Both of these boys happened to be four to five years older than me making my first driving experience at roughly the age of 7. That to, is never a good sign is it?

My parents always loved their cars. They still do. I remember looking at pictures of them from college in their very cool "convertibles". I can remember one of our cars as a small child. It was a 1969 Camero, gray with a black stripe running up the hood. We used to go to the Drive-ins in that car and my Mom used to love to scare my dad at night, on the back roads to her parents farm, by turning off the lights. My Dad would say at, certain appropriate moments "hold on Jenny, Mommy is driving".

At various points in my life my parents owned a Camero, Mustang, Thunderbird, Spider and Corvette. Imagine my horror when I was 11 or 12 and they decided it was time to purchase a pea green Volarie Station Wagon. Mind you, we always had a slick other car that my Mom would drive, not as hot or grand as those previously mentioned, but cool none the less. The green bomb was certainly not cool but lasted until I went away to college.

When I finally obtained the sacred laminated card that said I could legally drive, I had that feeling of freedom. I was no longer going to be repressed for I could let my spirit roam. I could not wait to get into my Mom's Mustang and cruise onto the school parking lot. What I failed to realize is that Koko was going to be cruising onto the parking lot in the green bomb with all her friends ducking down so they could not be seen with her. Alas, I was still able to maintain my coolness as I had the only vehicle that could hold 3 girls, 5 boys, several coolers of beer and several sleds. Koko is a derivative of my last name, upon which most could and cannot pronounce. Hence the shortened version to Koko. This nickname I do not mind as much and it holds a bit of nostalgia for me. If I hear someone refer to me as this I know it is an old friend. Koko could be counted on as well as the green bomb she drove.

If you were a very close and personal friend you were trusted and hence were allowed to go out with me on the nights I was allowed to drive one of the cool vehicles. The first time I was allowed to drive the Mustang I was dubbed Mario and the nic never went away, to this day. Or actually last night.

Hi CFB!!!

2005-08-16T11:42:00.000-04:00

I know you are reading! *winks*

Couple Time

2005-08-12T11:51:00.000-04:00

It is official. Next week we will only have our children for Thursday and Thursday night!! My MIL will be taking the kids on Monday and returning them on Thursday. My dad will then take the kids on Friday morning and return them sometime Saturday!!

Hubby and I are taking next Friday off work for a long weekend. Our plans are to visit either Put-N-Bay or Kelly's Island. I am so excited at the prospect of going out of town with just my hubby. In all honesty we have not had this type of situation come up in a long time. We have been in one of our marriage "down periods" and really need some time to be with each other, alone. Reconnecting and getting the communication going again will be a goal of mine. I will have his undivided attention and I am craving his attention.

It goes without saying that I love my children and miss them tremendously when they are away from me. I worry constantly about them while they are out of town without one of us. But I sincerely need this little break. To be able to get up in the morning and only worry about dressing myself and taking a leisurely shower. To have an uninterrupted conversation with my husband or even a walk around the block without 1-8 children going with us will feel like bliss.

I think taking a bath with candles and a bottle of wine just might be on my agenda too!

WOO HOO!

Okay another Meme

2005-08-11T11:15:00.000-04:00

I like this one, thought it was pretty funny and hacked it from some guy known as http://drunklaw.blogspot.com/

1. What's your favorite cheese? Colby Jack or Pepper Jack. Everyone needs a little spice.

2. Cheesy movie: If you were in Top Gun, what would your call sign be? Koko Butter

3. Big cheese: Tell us a boss story -- best boss, worst boss, a time when you were the boss, etc.

My first paralegal job was when I was 23. I was so nervous and was hired by the son of the attorney who owned the firm. Little did I know I would be working a lot more for his father and the other (whom I will call "Vince"). This man was 63 at the time I started working for him and was "old school". My second week on the job they sent me to get an important Motion filed in a divorce case. Said Motion had to be signed by the Judge prior to the filing. This all occurred at 4:20 p.m. on a Friday. HELLO...

So I am in the Judge's office with his secretary and he is getting ready to leave for the weekend. Imagine that, the judge was actually IN! He was not going to sign it. All that was going through my head was "shit shit shit". So I called "Vince" (the attorney who sent me on this foolish errand not "Old School") and explained what the Secretary had told me. "Vince" pulls his irate attorney act, which I had no clue at the time was an act, and wants to talk to the Secretary.

A little back story here. "Old School" and "Judge" go way back, "Old School" is a huge political supporter of "Judge" and Secretary has been with "Judge" for 30 years. Secretary knows "Vince" and he gets her to stamp my Motion.

Whew, I now have 20 minutes to get downstairs and get the motion filed with the Domestic Relations Court. HA! Murphy's Law was definitly playing havoc on my Friday afternoon. I cannot remember why the clerks would not take the Motion but they refused. I called "Vince", who proceeds into his tyrannicle attorney rant. All the while I am thinking "I am fired, I am done, my career is over!" Next thing I know Vince says we will pick you up met me at the back of the Courthouse.

So down I trot to face my destiny and sure firing. I get down to the street and see "Old School's" Mercedes being driven by son who hired me but no "Vince". Who steps out of the car but "Old School" himself. OH SHIT!!

"Old School" gets out of the Mercedes and says "lets go little girl" all rough and tough. Now I am totally bewildered and quite frankly, scared. It is now 4:55 p.m. and I am thinking what the hell is going to happen next. We arrive at correct floor, get off the elevator and see the doors to the Filing Office closed. What does "Old School" do...he bashes in the double doors and startes yelling "where is goddamn 'Head Admin', I want to talk to him NOW!" I jumped at least a foot in the air and I was trembling in my navy shoes just knowing I was dead meat after this all was said and done.

"Old School" bullies 'Head Admin', we get our Motion time stamped for 4:59 p.m. and as "Old School" and I are walking out of the Office and closing the doors behind us, he puts his arm around me and says "You did good little girl, ain't this fun?!!"

4. Say cheese: Are you a photobug? Are you photogenic? Or, in 1000 words or less, tell us about your best picture. Yikes...not sure if I have a best picture...lots of really bad ones. I like to take pics and my children are photogenic, but then again, whose child is not photgenic!!

5. Just cheesy: What's the worst pick-up line you've ever used, or had used on you? Did it work? I don't need to use pick-up lines, I have oobies!!

Party like rock stars

2005-08-08T10:57:00.000-04:00

I am very tired today but all in all it was a really fun weekend. My SIL and her family came into town Friday night at about 8:00 p.m. We had also invited SIL's in-laws who arrived at 9:00 p.m.

I will refer to my SIL's in-laws as the "rock stars". SIL's father-in-law used to own a bar. He and his wife had five (5) children. All of which have sampled the beer life. They are true connoisseurs, all seven. Not only were we invaded by our own family, we were invaded by BIL's family along with spouses or spouses to be. Hubby and I had 2 cases of beer already but as the Rock Stars walked in they also carried several cases of beer. I was thinking we should have bought a keg or at least raided our neighbors.

The din of conversation in my home was at an all time high and we had gotten out the bean bag game, or as some call it "corn hole", and were playing that on my deck as well as numerous Texas Hold'em games in the kitchen. I was having such a good time Ms. Grumpy Pants did not make an appearence once! Although I earned a new nickname of "gravy" which story I will reserve for another time. At some point "bad influence neighbor" (please see other vacation posts) let her dog out at about 2:30 a.m., and informed us on Saturday morning that we were partying like "Rock Stars" and why were they not invited to the Mouse house??!! I think she was a bit shocked that we were actually having a party!

After all was said and done (and children slept soundlessly through all) the rock stars left my house at 4:00 a.m. I was still in my jammies at 12:00 noon the next day when my adorable nephew asked "Aunt Jen are you EVEN going to get dressed today?" So with an outburst of laughter from all children and adults I said ok ok and went to get a shower. I don't think I can be a rock star anymore.

Saturday afternoon was the day of the wedding. Hubby and I babysat for SIL's three (3) children and had a really great day. I will leave the story at this point and just state for the record that the rock stars and my SIL did not get done partying until 4:00 a.m. again! I was just praying, as I went to bed Saturday night at 10:00 p.m., that the rock stars did not make an appearance at my home for the after hours.

P.S. Please note that there was a designated driver for each night. We are not without morals or common sense! Also, the beer drinking did not commence until all children were quietly tucked away to bed. This is my public disclaimer!!! lol

Grumpy, snarky, emotional

2005-08-05T10:55:00.000-04:00

What a day I am having and it is still morning! It is Friday! I should be happy the weekend is here, not Ms. Grumpy pants! I am backed up at work, the house needs cleaned, I need to go to the grocery and once again, we are spending the weekend with family.

Really, I love family, especially my hubby's family (most of the time). His younger sister has a wedding to go to in our town so their family is coming tonight. I love my niece and nephews, they are fun and adorable and love my children. Everyone gets along great. We are babysitting so my SIL and BIL can go to the wedding, party hard and not worry about kiddies. Actually, I am becoming closer and closer to my SILs and BILs the more time goes by. It is kind of special for me since I do not have brothers or sisters. Both BILs tease me like I am their sister and are such great uncles. My hubby's sisters put up with my snarky crap and are so laid back and fun it is hard not to love them. I am lucky on the in-law front.

So what exactly is my problem today? Jen needs time for herself, alone, without hubby or children. Without having some obligation to tend to. This summer has been non-stop and I am starting to feel the effects. What is that old saying...I always mess up old sayings but here goes "I can sleep when I am dead." is that right?

Oh well....have a great weekend everyone and if you feel so inclined today....humor me...or leave treats and *smooches*!

My heart is filled with sorrow for Ohio families

2005-08-04T13:01:00.000-04:00

http://www.newsday.com/news/nationworld/nation/wire/sns-ap-ohio-marines-killed,0,3124414.story?coll=sns-ap-nation-headlines

24 have been lost this week...24...It is a bit staggering and to know that some came from my hometown and my State. My heart and deepest sympathies go out to the families that lost a solider.

Camping

2005-08-04T10:27:00.000-04:00

Another mouse family outing, this time camping.

Camping with my mother is like going on a spiritual trek through the Himalayas in search of divine understanding. Well at least in my mother's eyes. My mother loves to camp, spends half the year searching the internet for the perfect campgrounds and knows every detail of each place before hubby or I can blink an eye. Granted, my mom does pick the best spots and has a canny knack of knowing that if she does not, I will bitch and moan. Yes I am a bit whiney about the whole camping thing because it does not bring me any divine notions. Plus I get dirty.

Did I mention that we camp in tents and up until two years ago we cooked only on the fire. I forced my mom to purchase a two burner hot plate. Yet the only time she will actually use that hot plate is to make the eggs, and sometimes she will just do that on the fire too. It could be 120 degrees out and my mother would build a fire to make lunch! Oh, I am bitching and moaning again, sorry for the interruption.

Back to divine understanding. My children were thrilled about camping with Granny. That is all little prince could talk about. He would count down on his fingers how many days until he got to sleep in a tent with his Granny. Little Princess felt the same way and for a girlie girl, loves to camp in a tent, eat s'mores and play in the dirt and mud. Actually, I did find a little spiritual place of my own. Watching my children help my mom with everything around the campgrounds. Watching my mom's face when I told her that she did good and found the perfect place. Seeing my mom smile when the kids jumped out of the van and screamed "GRANNY". That is why I camp every year. That is why, every year, my bitching and moaning decrease a little bit. Someday, we won't have the camping trips with Granny. But I will have been more spiritually enlightened because of my mom's trek to find the love that comes with camping with her family.

December 1992

2005-07-27T09:07:00.000-04:00

Everyone I know has had self defining moments. I believe that those moments are not far and few between. We continuously redefine who we are or more to the point redefine ourselves within the context of our relationships.

Writing the little meme the other day triggered a memory of a defining moment. A moment in which I knew I wanted to marry my then boyfriend. We had been together for two years and only had talked of the future in passing knowing that we had plenty of time for planning. We were, afterall, just in our mid 20s.

My boyfriend and I were out on a cold December evening on a typical Friday night date. We went to dinner, a movie and then were headed back to my apartment for the night. I loved my apartment and neighborhood. Victorian Village and the campus of OSU merge together and are crowded with beautiful historical homes. We liked staying at my place on Fridays because Saturday morning walks in the park were a must. The downfall to living in this building was the parking. It was horrendous to find a spot near my building or under good lighting. This Friday night was no exception.

We were later than normal going back to my apartment and had to park a block from my building in an unlighted area. I, being the music lover that I am, insisted we sit in the car to finish listening to a favorite song, something from the 80's, more than likely a song by U2. As we sat there enjoying the moment someone knocked on the driver's window of the car. It took my boyfriend a brief moment to assess what was really happening. Instead of rolling down the window my boyfriend opened the door and stood up to his full height. Later he told me he thought is was a homeless person that needed cash.

As my boyfriend is standing there I am totally bewildered but am the first to realize what is about to happen. I cannot hear the conversation that my boyfriend is having with the unknown person, but I can see the gun that is pointed at his side. I believe it took me 30 seconds to process what I was seeing and knew that my boyfriend did not have a clue about the gun.

My boyfriend was just talking with this intruder as if it were a causal how are you. I finally pulled on my boyfriends jacket and said he has a gun. At that point my boyfriend calmly sits back in the car and asks the man what he wants. I was watching this with a mild detached feeling as though everything was going in slow motion even though my mind was running 60 mph. The man said he just wanted my boyfriend's wallet and he would be on his way. So my boyfriend pulls his wallet from his back pocket, opens it, pulls out $100.00, hands it to the man and then puts his wallet back in his pocket. I was a bit shocked and in awe that my boyfriend would think to do this.

In the next moment the man asks my boyfriend for the keys to the car. My 60 mph mind just came to a skretching halt. I can still remember screaming in my head NOOOOO you are not taking me, in this car, anywhere! My boyfriend and the man are civilly discussing why the man wants the keys and in my hysteria I decide that I am getting the hell out of the car, he can take it. The man reaches in takes the keys and says to my boyfriend "I am just putting them on top of the car so you won't follow me." Those words were not registering in my mind. All I could think of was to get out of the car and away from the gun. Huge mistake on my part. You see, the intruder had an accomplice as a lookout and when he saw me open the door the accomplice was at my side, with a gun pointed at my chest. My shaking increased ten fold but my boyfriend was calm and said "Jen just sit down and don't cry, just look at me." I did what my boyfriend said. While, unbelievable, the man who was robbing my boyfriend was cordial and to the point, his accomplice was not. He continued to poke me with the gun and demanded my jewerly. Shaking uncontrollably I was attempting to unclasp the bracelets from my arm. Dear boyfriend finally said don't give them the satisfaction and ripped the bracelets from my arm, kissed me on the cheek and handed them to the accomplice. In turn I did the same with my necklaces knowing that the broken jewerly would not get much in a pawn shop.

And then, it was over. Just like that, they ran, but not without taking my car keys off the roof. My boyfriend was furious but was amazingly calm. So calm and focused that he watched them by sitting in the car using all the rearview mirrors. He saw what car they got into and which direction they were heading. My sobbing did not detour him from his destiny to make the punks pay or at least go to jail. My boyfriend still had his keys in his pocket which held one of my extra car keys. We tailed those men until boyfriend could see the license plate number. We then headed straight for the police station in downtown. We did our duty, filled out all the paperwork, looked at mugshots and drank lots of coffee.

In the 30 minutes that all this occurred I realized that I could have lost him. I could have lost a future that was just sitting there waiting to happen. The gun that was pointed at me did not matter as much as that gun that was pointed at my boyfriend. My boyfriend was strong and calm. My boyfriend told me how much he loved me and said he would have died for me. Died for me....THAT was a redefining moment. Not many women can say they found their hero. I did and I married him.

Meme

2005-07-25T15:34:00.000-04:00

shamelessly taken from my friend Alice! 35 Not-So-Questions

1) My uncle once: climbed a water tower in his hometown and painted his name across it. Luckliy his dad was the Police Chief.

2) Never in my life: have I kissed a girl.

3) When I was five: I still sucked my thumb.

4)High school was: lots of fun!

5) Fire is: scarey and hot.

6) I once saw: my husband held up at gunpoint.

7) There’s this woman I know who: jumped out of car to get away from her boyfriend

8) Once, at a bar: there is never anything good that can come from me starting a sentace with this!

9) By noon I’m usually: tired of requesting checks.

10) Last night: I read "My Secret Garden" to my children, ate corn on the cobb and watched "The Pacifer".

11) If I only had: traveled to Europe after H.S. *sigh* a missed opportunity

12) Next time I go to church: my son will go to pre-school bible study, oi he turns into the devil while at mass.

13) The best thing about my last relationship was: I don't really remember...been married a while now! lol

14) What worries me most: harm coming to my children in any form.

15) When I turn my head left: I see a blank wall in my office...I will be moving to another soon!

16) When I turn my head right: I see the door to my office and the hallway

17) You know I’m lying when: my voice cracks and my eyebrows stay raised.

18) What I miss most about the eighties: it certainly is not the hair! I am going to say MTV as well, this will keep in tune with my previous post.

19) If I were a character written by Shakespeare, I’d be: the beautiful heroine who saves everyone! What....

20) By this time next year: I will be on another vacation, hopefully without family!!

21) I have a hard time understanding: why people cannot accept others religious beliefs or faith.

22) You know I like you if: I acknowledge your presence, although I am pretty nice to everyone.

23) If I won an award, the first person I’d thank would be: My husband.

24) Darwin, Mozart, Slim Pickens & Geraldine Ferraro: are sitting around a campfire: I am not witty enough to answer this.

25) Take my advice, never: sit in your car, after dark, in a not so great neighborhood just to finish listening to a song you love on the radio.

26) My ideal breakfast is: bagel, butter and cafe mocha

27) If you visit my hometown, I suggest you go to: an OSU football game, they are a blast!

28) Why doesn’t everyone: learn to be more tolerant of things they did not always understand.

29) If you spend the night at my house: You will never worry about birth control again.

30) I’d stop my wedding: I wouldn't...we would keep going even with all the foils happening around us.

31) The world could do without: starvation

32) My favorite blonde is: My son!

33) If I do anything well, it’s: laugh at myself

34) And by the way: I don't think I am talking to myself any longer, thanks everyone for stopping by, leaving comments, and making me smile.

35) The last time I was drunk, I: played volleyball, closed down the bar, and woke up hubby when I got home at 3:00 a.m.!

Music Videos

2005-07-21T13:05:00.000-04:00

I grew up with music videos. I was there, glued to the TV, at my friend Kevann's house, when MTV aired for the first time. It was (insert valley girl voice) "omg, the best thing ever!" I love to watch videos and can see what the musician looks like. I always liked the videos that had dance routines, but also enjoyed the ones that showed guys belting one out.

So now that MTV does not play videos, at least while I am awake, I have taken to watching VH1 in the a.m. Well I watch when my kids don't have the Disney channel and Kim Possible on (*waves to kimmah*).

So this morning I am watching VH1 and finishing up the touches on my makeup. Then BAM Jessica Simpson pops onto the screen. When I say pop I mean POP! Whoa....I am no prude but I was a bit in shock at this new video, "These Boots Are Made For Walking". The girl is hotter than hot and I thought for a moment there I was in a nudie/exotic dancer bar. Mind you, I have not been to that type of bar so I am just making a wild guess here and my mind wondered for just a bit. I will let you think what you want about where I wondered to.

Well after I came out of that little daze I turn to see my two children in the room with me. I am in a bit of horror struck moment as my daughter asks "who is that" and I say "Jessica Simpson." My daughter replies "THAT is not Jessica Simpson!" I say "ok, maybe not, lets get going, click." For some reason my four year old son was just staring at the screen and did not say a word.

I think I filled my bad mom quota for the day. Not sure we can watch VH1 in the a.m. any longer and will most certainly have to clue hubby in on the new diversion that has become music videos.

Family Night

2005-07-20T09:49:00.000-04:00

Last night was a pretty good night for our family. Everything just fell together in an unplanned way and we were able to enjoy a hot summer night.

I made fetteccini alfredo. The sauce and noodles were yummy and we ate the whole pot. Everyone helped with the dishes and the clean up, which was a shock to my system. We discussed going to play tennis and hubby and I decided that it was a good evening to do that.

We went to a local high school which has an elementary school next to it. It was balmy, hot and sticky but we all four played. I had bought the kids new rackets a few weeks ago upon my cousin telling me my kids were naturals. Hubby played with them last week and said they both did very well. I am not surprised as my mom (the extraordinary athlete) was semi-pro in college. I have not played in over five years and got the workout of my life. I am surprised I can type this entry today! The kids really played hard and my son, my son is the natural. It amazes me that any sport this young boy tries he excels, talk about a wicked back hand. Once we all were sweating buckets my son exclaimed "my hair is wet, how did my hair get wet!" I knew it was time for a break.

Ah the swings! I love to swing and this playground had the best swings. You know the ones, they have the big triangle shaped metal poles. They have the chain link "ropes" and nice wide seats that sit high up off the ground. Hubby, daughter and I were swinging high into the sky. It was the absolute best feeling in the world to be swinging like that and watching my daughter giggle at her mommy and daddy. While we were enjoying the swings my son was mastering the monkey bars. That child is a monkey and will give me at least 10 heartattacks during my lifetime. Last night felt so good and so right, it fit the word FAMILY.

So how could this family of four end their wonderful family night? We went home and I made banana splits! The kids took theirs with no nuts, but hubby and I, we are nuts. Once in awhile you get it right.

Hello my name is Jen and....

2005-07-15T09:42:00.000-04:00

I am a Harry Potter geek. Yes thats right I freely admit this. I belong to a book club and help moderate a forum devoted to these books.

So today is Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince day...woo hoo...fandom and geeks around the world are screaming Go Go Gryffindor! I had pre-ordered my book two (2) months ago and I have been assured by Barnes & Noble that it will be delievered tomorrow. I will have it read by 6:00 a.m. on Sunday.

I have been invited to Borders this evening to witness the feastivities, however, I have not been able to hire a babysitter. Quite frankly I am not sure I am ready to witness 20 and 30 somethings dressed up as Harry and Hermione. But then again that could provide for some pretty good fodder for me to write about! Oh who am I kidding, I would not betray my fellow HP geeks, I secretly own a T-shirt that says "Mishchief Managed"!

My Sisters have lead me astray!

2005-07-14T13:07:00.000-04:00

They told me how great it was. They told me that I would be happy that I did it. They said I would be most pleased with the results. They told me after 3 or 4 times it will feel natural and you will look great. Many could not believe that I had not ever done it before and asked "what are you waiting for?"

So I made the appointment and took the plunge yesterday. That appointment required 3 advil and two beers while being subjected to the toture treatment.

Yes, my sisters lead me astray. All I have to say today is "OUCH!"

This and That

2005-07-08T10:19:00.000-04:00

First and foremost, my heart and prayers go out to all of England for the cowardly attacks yesterday. I am glad to see our friends across the ocean holding up well and have not let this set them back.

Second, thanks to all who replied to my 4th of July post! I hope everyone had a fun and safe holiday. I have read some reports and it appears that many of us like to partake in the American past time (the Canadian one too) of celebrating with beers...here is to you my friends!!!!

The D.C. trip was ok, very hectic and with family. Need I say more really. My dad's family, always full of drama, reminded me why I only want to see them once a year. My children had a great time and hubby drank, a lot. I can't blame hubby, I wanted to drink a lot too and finally did on Sunday night, after chaos had reigned supreme at my cousin's home. I was reminded why I love my husband and why we are good together. He kept me grounded and helped me to not lose my cool. *smooches* to him!

We did visit Mt. Vernon like the good tourists we are. I had a great time with my kids. I had not been through the house since the 8th grade and really enjoyed seeing it. My children are troopers and were well behaved despite the heat. We took a lovely ride on the cruise boat and enjoyed the view of Mt. Vernon. It is truly spectacular. At some point I will try my hand at posting some of the pics I have taken, but I am notoriously bad at following through with those.

It is the weekend, thank goodness, but again we will be spending time with family. I can't seem to escape these people. I am not that witty and fun. Why does everyone insist on spending time with us? Oh thats right, because I tend to try and make everyone happy and do the right thing. I plan parties well, always having the right amount of food, drink and games. I usually always smile and have something nice to say. I don't quite feel that way at the moment. I suppose I will need an attitude adjust before tomorrow or maybe I will just drink a lot.

4th of July

2005-06-27T11:49:00.000-04:00

I will be in the Washington D.C. area this weekend celebrating the birthday of this great nation.

It is really just another chance to see some family and set the mouse family traveling again. We will be visiting Mt. Vernon and Old Georgetown like the good tourists we are. No stoopid plans for this trip, only family, food and fun.

What are your plans for the 4th?

The Ugly Tourist

2005-06-24T11:00:00.000-04:00

Or should that be the stoopid tourist?

After driving through some torrential downpours on our way to the panhandle of Florida, we encountered tropical storm Arlene. Let me tell you she was ugly on many levels. Actually, the wind was the worst part of the storm, that and all the crap that Arlene pushed up into the Gulf.

So back to being stoopid tourists. There we are, nine of us, walking up our boarded up boardwalk, which by the way had all the yellow police tape around it, warning of us that the beach was CLOSED. Closed, ha ha, we just drove 17 hours (which should have been 13) and they think a little yellow tape will keep us from our destination!

Back to stoopid again...yes we had four of the seven children we had with us on that boardwalk area. We also had the video cameras and digital cams for prosperity sake. We were the ultimate tourists, you know the type, the ones that you scream at while watching the weather channel during all hurricane type weather. In that instant I became that stoopid tourist I scream at "get the hell out of there, you MORON!" I am on the video tape saying these exact words and laughing about it.

Right now I am just shaking my head at my lack of responsibility. *sigh* some days I am a decent human who does not do stoopid things, I swear.

Unmotivated

2005-06-22T12:07:00.000-04:00

I can't seem to get motivated to do anything here at work. I have loads to do and just want to play. Ugh being back from vacation is HARD!

I really want to post about our trip but can't seem to bring myself to write out the details. I have a messy house that needs cleaned and children that need supervision. Yikes, I need a vacation from everything. Just one day and one night to be by myself!

All right...after lunch work. I will play later. Right, keep telling yourself that kid.

Preparing for Vacation...not an easy task

2005-06-10T09:55:00.000-04:00

We leave for Florida tonight, after work, after another softball game. Am I ready? Hmmm

So after work last night I come home and tell hubby I need to run to Target for some last minute things, you know, a boat load of those things that only Target will have! Hubby has his own softball game and the kids are at the neighbors swimming. We have really great neighbors, everyone gets along and we all like to have beers together every now and again. So I decide to get the kids so they can go to the store we call heaven.

The neighbors know we are leaving and that hubby has softball and say aww let them stay it is ok, as the four adults sit on the front porch drinking beer from the kegerater. I ask if they are sure, of course we are sure, go Jen go.

So I go to my heaven and obtain my manna and all necessary last minute thingys. Upon returning home hubby has left for his softball game and I decide to retrieve my kiddos. I still have lots of packing and what not to do for our trip. Not to mention I have to address Birthday party invites for the princes' party on the 25th. You know that feeling, that last minute rush of adrenaline to just get everything in order. I was totally running on that rush.

HA! Come on Jen sit down and have one beer. The dishes can wait you can pack later, stay with us for half an hour. This is how these devil neighbors suck me in, at the worst possible times. So needless to say one beer and half an hour turn into six beers and 2 hours, I think. I am a bit blurry and only know that the dishes did not get done until 11:00 p.m. last night and I was still doing laundry before I left for the office this a.m.

My neighbors, they are evil.

I love a good quote!

2005-06-07T13:35:00.000-04:00

"This is the age of instant gratification. If I wanted uncertainty and doubt, I'd participate in life instead of watching television." Joe Blundo, Columbus Dispatch

Vacation and other things

2005-05-31T09:29:00.000-04:00

We leave for Florida in less than two weeks! I am very excited as we have not had a full blown vacation since Disney in November 2003. Oh heck that is not true we did go to Vegas, but that was not restfull lol! Last year was hell as I had two surgeries and started a new job. While we take little breaks, usually to drive to relatives for various occasions, this is a much needed break to the beach with the in-laws.

The in-laws!!! you say! Mine are actually pretty good. I enjoy my hubby's two sisters and their husbands very much. We all get along and hubby's family is pretty laid back. It is my mom that makes me insane and yes she is going along on this trip as well! We had this same set up in the summer of 2003 in the Outer Banks and surprisingly it was great, really great. The kids had the time of their lives, my MIL and mom got along great, shopped and helped take care of their mutual grandchildren. My FIL always does his own thing and makes a mean barbecue chicken. So yes, I am excited to go on vacation that I know will be lots of fun!

On to the other things. I told hubby about this on-line blog thing and meeting peeps from another site. Needless to say he is a bit leery and wondering what the hell has gotten into me! He has been wondering why I have been spending so much time on the net and computer and I explained that it is a bit of an escape and has helped me get some much needed things off my chest. Hubby thinks I am too friendly and that this could possibly be dangerous. So now I have started thinking about if I want to continue blogging/LJ. I really like being able to write out my feelings and share various things. The only feature here that I don't like is that you can't hide some things or only allow certain "friends" to be able to view. That is what I like about the LJ community. I have agreed to take down pics of him and I that I have here. I don't think I am that interesting enough for someone to really care about what I write other than some friends on the net. But I don't want my hubby to feel insecure or worried about this. So I may take a break depending on how chatty I feel.

Poker anyone??

2005-05-27T13:00:00.000-04:00

Hubby called and let me know that after softball he is playing poker tonight. Good for him I say as we all need time apart from family life every now and again! See I can be a good wifey!

So after the kiddies are tucked away I will probably try my hand once again in the internet poker world. I backed away for a time as I got bored rather quickly and much prefer a live game. Once in a while I can catch my BILs (brother-in-laws) at Ultimate Bet and get in a game that is fun. I like the money tables much better than the free chippy ones. The free games tend to bring the "all in on first hand type" and that drives me batty!

Ah Friday night, alone with the computer, a beer and a poker game...life could be a bit better than that!

Softball....AGAIN!!

2005-05-24T11:35:00.000-04:00

We had our first offical softball game last night! I was so excited and it was loads of fun! I am very proud of our girls and they played so well. I am truly surprised at how much knowledge they gained and how they have improved. I am also surprised at how many of the girls want to actually play catcher and wear all that equipment! It warms my heart, I have such a soft spot for that position.

We had buckets full of bubble gum, girls singing about not playing with Barbie Dolls and wonderful parents who were supportive, encouraging and helpful to this very insecure coach!

The best moments for me are when the girls called me Coach Jennifer and thanked me after the game, I almost cried. I cannot tell you how much better I am today for those little girls last night. I still have a lot to learn but those girls really made coaching worth it. And my daughter, she is an ace..."Mommy, I love softball, I cannot wait for our next game!" I could not stop smiling!

Eisenhower and the wisdom of my Granny's generation

2005-05-18T14:57:00.000-04:00

"Should any political party attempt to abolish social security, unemployment insurance, and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history. There is a tiny splinter group, of course, that believes you can do these things. Among them are [a] few other Texas oil millionaires, and an occasional politician or business man from other areas. Their number is negligible and they are stupid."

- President Dwight D. Eisenhower -

Made me think after a bit of a political discussion with my mother and my aunt.

Softball

2005-05-17T10:15:00.000-04:00

Could I be more insecure? (in my best Chandler voice)

So we had practice for daughter's softball team last night. I am not sure what makes me so insecure about being the head coach but I get all nervous around these little girls with the parents watching. Ah that is the crux of the situation, the parents are watching. I have not had any problems with the parents and the girls are so sweet and are really excited about playing! So why am I insecure...what makes me feel like I am going to fail at one of my better talents...Playing softball? This, I need to ponder and get over!

I need to learn to take a compliment and let the insecurity go. My assistant coach is a wonderful lady who I will call Sue. She has two lovely little girls on the team. Sue is a school teacher and has never played sports before. But she is ready, willing and able to help with this softball team. You have to appreciate any parent that wants to devote their time to 10 active and talkative girls!! Sue gave me a great compliment last night. She said that I was a natural with these girls and I am very caring and sensitive to what each girl needs. I was stunned at first and a bit speechless unitl I realized that I needed to say thank you!

Sue's few comments about how I work with the girls really made me take a look at myself. My insecurity is at an all time high even though I had a good review at work last week, hubby is devoting more time to us and now I get a compliment about how well I am working with this softball team. I need to step away from me and concentrate on what will make others around me feel better or more comfortable with themselves. I need to get some perspective on what is making me feel alone and insecure when clearly there is no need to feel those things.

I love softball and want the experience for my daughter and the rest of the girls to be a good one. I need to check my insecurities at the gate and have fun!

My week

2005-05-14T12:31:00.000-04:00

I had been stressed and not sleeping all week.

I had my review for my job on Wednesday. I was pleasantly surprised. I got a GOOD rating out of either Excellant, Good, Satisfactory, Below Average, Poor. Not sure if anyone can ever achieve an excellant but I have decided that if I want to stay with this firm I want to make that my goal for this next year. I got a raise and lots of kudos for doing a job that is difficult and work under someone who is "anal retentive" and that is a quote from our Department Head. lol

I had to get new migraine medication on Thursday. I have been stressing out over my marriage, work, kids, you know the usual life stuff. It seems that my migraines pop up at this time of year for some reason. Not sure what it is about the month of May but this is when my migraines are the worst.

Thursday night dear prince starting puking at about 10:00 p.m. He did not stop until 8:00 a.m. yesterday. Ugh, no sleep for me for most of this week. I stayed home on Friday and dear prince is feeling much better today. He has been able to keep down foods and is currently outside with Princess and their neighborhood friends.

Not doing much today, although I should be cleaning. Still too tired though and wanted a few minutes to do something for me. Why is that so hard for us moms sometimes? If I am not up doing something every 10 minutes I feel guilty or like something is missing. Maybe this is the cause of the migraines (insert sarcastic voice here).

My dad is going to babysit for hubby and I tonight. I think I would like to go to dinner out at Easton and see a movie. We never go to Easton and there are so many places to have a great dinner. I am in the mood for Mexican. I keep hoping time for just Chris and I will help get us back on track. Communications is the key but so is trying to communicate. Some days we want to be together that way and others it seems that neither one of us cares. Well at least we are trying.

Mom's Day

2005-05-09T11:23:00.000-04:00

My Mother's Day:

1. My daughter signing I love you Mommy and then signing Happy Mother's Day; and
2. My son kissing me on the check and holding on for dear life "you are the bestest mommy ever!"

No need for jewelry, hats, socks, t-shirts, appliances or cards. I will remember those two sentiments forever!! My children are my best accomplishments and I would not trade being a mommy for anything else in the world!

As for my Mom, well her and I have always had an estranged type of relationship. However, once I got married and gave birth to my first child everything in our relationship changed. Not sure what happened to my Mom but her demeanor about life did a 180. My Mom was not the best at being a mom and was not an emotional giver. But she did instill quite a bit of values and truth into my soul so I thank her for that. I also thank her for the amount of love and affection she shows my husband and children. They deserve the best and she does provide that for them which watching is a bit surreal for me. So I made sure to hug my mom yesterday and tell her that I love her. After all without my Mom I would not have this life I live nor the children that have made things so very worthwhile.

2005-05-06T21:25:00.000-04:00

Christmas party