There are so many different kinds of love. The love of your spouse or signficant other are usually the biggest loves of our lives. The only exception I can make to that is our children. There is your love for your friends and family. Sometimes the love you have for certain members of your family is only a deep caring.
Deep loves are so rare. I love my children deeply and I know at one time I loved my husband deeply. How do we get back to that kind of love without being hurt or overtaken by other emotions? Or the day in and day out workings of life?
There has been so much more that has been going on in my life in the last year that I am struggling with so many emotions. How do you reconcile hypocritical behavior and not lose yourself? How do you forgive yourself and the persons that you love, because we are afterall just human. Most of us don't intentionally set out to hurt eachother.
I have truly tried to understand what goes through a man mind when dealing with a relationship. I have tried to be open and honest but when all that fails where does it leave you? I still feel the love, I can't stop loving. Does that make me a fool?
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16 comments:
Loving never ever makes you a fool.
Even though sometimes it feels that way.
*smooch*
No, you are not a fool. It's all hard sometimes. But, you are experiencing life which has to be a healthy thing too. Take care, Girl.
Just wanted to offer {{hugs}}.
I don't think I can help you understand what is going on in a man's mind, even though I am one of course. Every relationship is different. They change over time, and the intensity dies down. We take certain things for granted. There is resentment as a result. It's all ebb and flow. My grandma once told me that it takes way more than love to make a relationship last. But love is always there, just not on the surface. Just wait until something happens to someone you love, something that threatens to take that away. You will see how much it is still there.
The hardest part is loving and not having the loved one meet your expectations. Alice Walker once said something like, "Expect nothing and live frugally on surprise." This is my new mantra. No one can fall short anymore.
Of course, there's the part of someone just plain treating you terribly. Then it's a question of believing you're worth more than being a victim. I hope this isn't what's going on with you.
No, it makes you human, not a fool. I wish I had some good advice, but all I can offer is
*hugs*
you're not a fool, just human that's all. marriage has its ups and downs- i don't think you ever stop loving the other person, it just changes over time- i guess you feel different types of love...
Nope, no fool.
I think the forgetting is an important as the forgiving and when in doubt have a starting over celebration.
t: You know on some level I totally agree with you and once upon a time that was my philosophy. However, when you become so unhappy with the direction of your life how do you pull yourself out of it. Sometimes it is not so easy as sucking up and doing the right thing all the time. I am by no means at that point in my life, just at a bit of a crossroads as is my husband. We are working on things, it is just a slow process.
Thanks to everyone that replied. At one time this was a place to work through feelings and thoughts and all of your comments and responses really do help and touch me.
{{{hugs}}}
I just wanted to say hello. Even though I havent posted a comment in a long time, I wanted you to know that I still check in on you from time to time.
Hugs to you, Jen. I just had a little tiff with DH today, and I talked things out with him afterward, privately in our bedroom, because I was hurt and it was obvious he was, too. Like you said, we don't mean to hurt each other. We came to a decision about communicating better with each other and I hope that will help us.
It sounds like you may have some deeper issues that have built up over time. I'd suggest marriage counseling, if you aren't already doing that.
Hey Jen, hope you are ok.
...And honey, don't try to figure out men's minds, are you crazy? You're female!
Just stopped by to
*smooch*
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